These are the woods who nursed my inner child
These are the trees who suckled me with their sap,
Who nourished me back to health when I was almost depleted
When life had me leave,
These woods were still supporting me
These are the woods who offered her wood to keep me warm in the night,
Who protected me and bathed me in sweet moonlight.
These are the woods that taught me to sing,
Who taught me to dance, who taught me to be.
These are the woods who heard me cry and soothed me with her gentle lullaby.
These are the woods who introduced me to myself, from whose breast I nursed the sweet milk of remembrance.
These woods introduced me to my doe and my roots.
They gave me breath and life.
These woods are the sacred mother spirit in my life.
She brings me up in love,
And lets me go spread what she’s taught me.
I am the dedicated child who will make her mother proud.
I have the strength and the confidence to leave her sweet rich bosom and face the world.
She gave me the courage, and when I leave these woods, I never abandon the mother.
I carry her with me always.
The smell of tulip poplar is a purple stripe in my heart.
Wednesday, September 1, 2010
Sunday, July 11, 2010
The Vision
The vision is like tihs:
Consciously living. Intentionally living. To have land in the mountains. To have an apple orchard and grow other things-- herbs and veggies. To have solar power, recycling, and compost. To have ample space for guests. To have a wood stove and goats. To make my own cheese and yogurt. To bake my own bread from sprouted spelt-berry flour. To have a home that I used my hands to build. To have a partner in this work to love and to be with, to build with, to learn with, and to share my commitment to God with, to that something greater than ourselves. To have a school that teaches consciousness, teaches awakening, teaches yoga and meditation, and how to do and how to be, how to do from a place of being, how to be an individual from a place of unity, how to evolve, how to love and to be grateful. To be a place open and a home to people of all backgrounds, to anyone open to ahavat ben adam. To be a place where people of different religious backgrounds can come together and realize our oneness and our shared truth, while still appreciating and respecting each of our spiritual paths. To make healthy food and eat together- kosher vegetarian food. To have a mezuzah on the door. To host shabbatot-- I imagine it like this: to host many people in my home to food that is organic and fresh. We sit on pillows on the floor and eat slowly. Many candles are lit. The space is quiet. The energy is strong and healing. Only one person speaks at a time, or sometimes no one. All meditative, ascending together while still feeding our very animals in order to remain here and work here in this world. Ascending while still within this world. To write-- stories, books, movies-- and to have people read and be affected positively. To be a pure vessel for Hashem in every thing that I do, say, walk, listen, touch, taste, see, breathe... To be a true friend, daughter, sister, lover, wife, teacher, student, mother, grandmother...To be a true Shifra. To be a true human being. To be true. To be.
This is my vision. This is what I hear when I listen. This is my prayer.
Amen.
Consciously living. Intentionally living. To have land in the mountains. To have an apple orchard and grow other things-- herbs and veggies. To have solar power, recycling, and compost. To have ample space for guests. To have a wood stove and goats. To make my own cheese and yogurt. To bake my own bread from sprouted spelt-berry flour. To have a home that I used my hands to build. To have a partner in this work to love and to be with, to build with, to learn with, and to share my commitment to God with, to that something greater than ourselves. To have a school that teaches consciousness, teaches awakening, teaches yoga and meditation, and how to do and how to be, how to do from a place of being, how to be an individual from a place of unity, how to evolve, how to love and to be grateful. To be a place open and a home to people of all backgrounds, to anyone open to ahavat ben adam. To be a place where people of different religious backgrounds can come together and realize our oneness and our shared truth, while still appreciating and respecting each of our spiritual paths. To make healthy food and eat together- kosher vegetarian food. To have a mezuzah on the door. To host shabbatot-- I imagine it like this: to host many people in my home to food that is organic and fresh. We sit on pillows on the floor and eat slowly. Many candles are lit. The space is quiet. The energy is strong and healing. Only one person speaks at a time, or sometimes no one. All meditative, ascending together while still feeding our very animals in order to remain here and work here in this world. Ascending while still within this world. To write-- stories, books, movies-- and to have people read and be affected positively. To be a pure vessel for Hashem in every thing that I do, say, walk, listen, touch, taste, see, breathe... To be a true friend, daughter, sister, lover, wife, teacher, student, mother, grandmother...To be a true Shifra. To be a true human being. To be true. To be.
This is my vision. This is what I hear when I listen. This is my prayer.
Amen.
Thursday, June 24, 2010
SMELL
1. Peanuts smell like peanuts, but the smell starts to loose its potency if you
focus on it for too long.
2. The airport train smells like dry carpet.
3. Atlanta smells like thick humid heat.
4. Nitrous gas smells like bubble gum.
5. Hot leather car seats smell like meat cooking slowly in the sun.
6. The smell of lavender irrigates my lungs.
focus on it for too long.
2. The airport train smells like dry carpet.
3. Atlanta smells like thick humid heat.
4. Nitrous gas smells like bubble gum.
5. Hot leather car seats smell like meat cooking slowly in the sun.
6. The smell of lavender irrigates my lungs.
SPEECH
I haven’t had to communicate that much with many people. I have been mostly with close friends and haven’t needed to say much. I am traveling now to the airport, so I will see what’s in store for me the rest of the day. When I was most conscious of my speech was this morning while praying. I tried to pronounce the words very clearly and listen to them. First, I did yoga. Then, I prayed. Yoga includes meditation and often times prayer is included silently into the yoga practice through silent intention, the breath, the meditation, and quiet thoughts to both ourselves and to that something greater, our creator. But there is a difference between that and actually speaking the words of prayer out loud. There is something actualizing about speech. Speech is less tangible than an object, but more than a thought.
Another exercise for this day is to try and be comfortable in silence. Don’t rush to fill the space with talk. The world expects us to joke, to tease, to be light without speech, but what does it feel like when we only use speech for the absolutely necessary and in a one hundred percent honest way, to express and communicate those less tangible thoughts rather than to use speech to mask them. We use speech to greet, thank, to be respectful of others, to express love, to resolve conflict, to ask a question, to give an answer, to help us with out avodat Hashem (Service of God), to pray, etc.
My Hebrew is okay. It is not great, but I can get by. Today however I feel tongue-tied. The Hebrew feels less accessible than usual and I realize how precious language is. Without language, our interpersonal communication must occur through means other than speech. When I cannot use my voice by manipulating it into a language to speak to others, what else can my voice be for? Sometimes I feel spontaneously inspired to use my voice by humming a tune that expresses the emotions of my heart. The melodies are little prayers. They express gratitude mostly, also yearning, and sometimes sadness or pain or happiness that is rooted in gratitude and in knowing that Hashem in guiding me. This knowing I feel even as I feel heaviness at the knowledge that I am on the way to the airport in order to leave Israel for a little while. I feel gratitude that I came, that I was able to listen, that I learned what I learned and met who I met. So many gifts. I feel gratitude because I know that by leaving here I will go somewhere else and see other people and learn and share more things.
Speech is different than writing. Speech is quicker. We can speak faster than we can write, hence, “speaking without thinking.” At least when writing, even in free-flow writing, it takes a second to write out the letters. An exercise is to speak as if it were writing. That is to say, think before speaking. At least take the same amount of time that it would have taken to write out the letters before speaking. Write it out in your head. Also, speak positively. Realize that our speech is the expression of energy vibrations. The vibrations (via tone and words) can carry a negative or a positive energy. By speaking only the positive, we ensure that our speech is only transmitting positive energy.
Another exercise for this day is to try and be comfortable in silence. Don’t rush to fill the space with talk. The world expects us to joke, to tease, to be light without speech, but what does it feel like when we only use speech for the absolutely necessary and in a one hundred percent honest way, to express and communicate those less tangible thoughts rather than to use speech to mask them. We use speech to greet, thank, to be respectful of others, to express love, to resolve conflict, to ask a question, to give an answer, to help us with out avodat Hashem (Service of God), to pray, etc.
My Hebrew is okay. It is not great, but I can get by. Today however I feel tongue-tied. The Hebrew feels less accessible than usual and I realize how precious language is. Without language, our interpersonal communication must occur through means other than speech. When I cannot use my voice by manipulating it into a language to speak to others, what else can my voice be for? Sometimes I feel spontaneously inspired to use my voice by humming a tune that expresses the emotions of my heart. The melodies are little prayers. They express gratitude mostly, also yearning, and sometimes sadness or pain or happiness that is rooted in gratitude and in knowing that Hashem in guiding me. This knowing I feel even as I feel heaviness at the knowledge that I am on the way to the airport in order to leave Israel for a little while. I feel gratitude that I came, that I was able to listen, that I learned what I learned and met who I met. So many gifts. I feel gratitude because I know that by leaving here I will go somewhere else and see other people and learn and share more things.
Speech is different than writing. Speech is quicker. We can speak faster than we can write, hence, “speaking without thinking.” At least when writing, even in free-flow writing, it takes a second to write out the letters. An exercise is to speak as if it were writing. That is to say, think before speaking. At least take the same amount of time that it would have taken to write out the letters before speaking. Write it out in your head. Also, speak positively. Realize that our speech is the expression of energy vibrations. The vibrations (via tone and words) can carry a negative or a positive energy. By speaking only the positive, we ensure that our speech is only transmitting positive energy.
Exercise for Elevating Consciousness
The first thing to realize is that we are asleep. That is the first step to waking up. We want to live consciously and intentionally. We want to see and to know the true reality that is beneath what we sometimes believe is reality. We want to know the truth about existence and being. We want to live in a way that is so conscious and intentional that every single action, every breath, every step, every single chew of a food, every blink of an eye, every word spoken, every glance given, every single thing is for the service of God, for the purpose of being closer to BEING. That (being closer to God) is chukat hatorah/ point of torah. The chuk( unexplainable law of torah) is being closer to God. The parsha entitled “chukat” is the parsha that talks about the red hefer. The red hefer is basically that which (or rather her ashes) can purify the impure. Impurity implies distance from God, whereas purity is closeness to God. Therefore, the chuk/purpose of torah is closeness to God. (See Nitivot Shalom for a deeper explanation of this concept).
Since we are put on this earth in order to do work, to awaken consciousness and awareness, we do not want to waste time. Rather, we want every action to be the conscious placement of another piece of glass in the mosaic of our life, and each of our personal mosaics come together to create the mosaic of true Reality with a big R. When complete, the mosaic of Reality will be like a stained glass window to the world. The stained glass depicts a picture of Reality, of Oneness, of God, of the truth of where we all came from and where we are going. Before the stained glass mosaic is completed, however, the window is clear. The clear window means that Reality is transparent, and a person could easily look through the window without noticing the glass/ a person could easily look at the world and look through the existence of a greater purpose, of a creator, of the interconnectedness of all, and think that what he sees through the window is all there is… just a bunch on lonely trees blowin’ in the wind… The mosaic that we create via our actions reveals the beautiful design through which the world exists, and it reveals to us that there is a creator, and that the creator is that which was, that which is, and that which will be forever, without restraint of time. The creator is every thing and no thing at the same time. It cannot be described. It is the creative energy, the flow, the force, the soul, the name, etcetera. It (the creator) hid itself and pulled back a little in order to create a space in which creation could exist. Now, through billions of years of evolution (from human perspective) we have come from being with It (the creator) as the only existence, to becoming mineral life, plant life, animal life, and finally human life. As humans, on the one hand, we are farther from God than the rock because the rock is only BEing. The rock is constantly present. As humans, we are distracted by and caught up in physicality, our ego, our emotions, and our intellect. But as humans, we can reach a higher consciousness than the rock due to the very intellect that sometimes can distract us. We have the ability to elevate physicality and use our minds to bring us, as humans, back up to the place of BEing, and to wake up from our sleep and from the distractions of the world, and to realize that it is all One. We must realize that on the one hand, everything is perfect and nothing needs to be changed, and on the other hand, we have so much work to do here in order to reveal the truth about the Oneness.
But HOW DO WE WAKE UP? Spiritual practice is necessary. For me, I practice yoga. Many people also use mantra. Sometimes I use the mantra, “I release everything to Hashem (the universe, the creator, God); I own nothing.” And also today when I was being tortured at the dentist for three hours, “There is no pleasure. No pain. It’s just a sensation.” These are my two examples. I also am Jewish and practice Judaism. I use the teachings of torah and their wisdom to help direct me. I use the teachings (for example, Shabbat) as a spiritual practice to help elevate my awareness of God and of what my work is here in this world. But I want more. I want ooooober consciousness. We have come up with an exercise to help elevate consciousness.
The exercise
The exercise is one week long. After one week, it should be repeated again for three more weeks to equal one month, at least. Each day of the week is dedicated to one of the five senses, sight, smell, touch, hearing, and taste, and also breath and speech.
The weekly schedule is as follows:
Sunday – Breath.
Monday – Vision
Tuesday – Speech
Wednesday – Smell
Thursday – Touch
Friday – Hearing
Saturday – Taste/ eating
The daily schedule is as follows: I will use Sunday as an example, but the basic structure is the same each day. Sunday is breath. For five minutes in the morning (you should set an alarm) before going out, spend five minutes on focused breathing. Watch the breath while sitting down with your eyes closed. If you know any other breath exercises, you may want to practice them. Notice what part of your body you are breathing from/into (belly or chest) and where you send your breath. Practice sending your breath to every part, every cell, of your body. Send the breath to your kidneys and to any place that is in pain or seems to lack a flow of energy. At one o’clock and five o’clock, continue doing whatever you happen to be doing, but for the next twenty minutes, also focus on the breath. As you continue doing whatever you were doing at that time, notice how you are breathing. Are the breaths full and deep or short and shallow? After twenty minutes, you do not have to focus on the breath as much, but ideally the awareness will linger with you. Then, at night before going to bed, do another five minutes of focused breathing like in the morning.
On Monday, the day to concentrate on our vision, the daily structure is the same. Five minutes in the morning and before bed of focused concentration on vision, and twenty minutes of heightened awareness at one and five, while continuing to do whatever you were doing. For vision, notice the things around you, objects and people alike, and see them without judgment. Try to see the soul of the object. See the object as it is without its name and connotations. Notice colors. See things as a collection of colors. Colors are reflections of light. See the object as a collection of reflected light. Also look at your own body and see it for what it is, without judgment and with gratitude.
Tuesday is speech. In the morning, pronounce your prayers aloud and clearly or pick a spiritual writing or teaching or even poetry to read out loud. While you should be focused on speech the entire day, you may set the alarm at one and five to remind yourself and refocus. Try to avoid idle speech and talking badly about others. Notice how you speak to people. What is your tone? How do you react to what others speak to you? Do you use words to fuel or diffuse conflict? Are your words honest or misleading? At night, again read something out loud or pray out loud.
Wednesday is smell. In them morning before going out, take a spice or essential oil or herb and focus on smelling it for a few minutes. Smell without judgment or preconceived notions. Perhaps you will grab a spice from the cabinet without reading which spice it is. At one and five, remind yourself to notice smalls. When you eat, smell the food first. Notice what different places smell like, etc. At night, do a few minutes meditating on the same spice as in the morning.
Thursday is touch. In the morning and at night, the five minutes should be spent touching your body and some natural object like a seashell, a plant, water, or a stone. Touch the object with your eyes closed. Touch your face with your eyes closed. Notice the subtle details of texture. At one and five again remind yourself to refocus on touch. Notice throughout the day when you catch yourself touching (an object, your hair, scratching your skin, etc) unconsciously. Notice what your body is touching as well (your tush on the seat, for example). When touching a person, do it with intention and not mindlessly.
Friday is hearing. In the morning, step outside or open the window and be quiet and spend five minutes just listening to what your hear. Don’t judge. If it is very quiet in your room, then notice what does your breath sound like? What does the silence sound like? During the day, notice different sounds. What does your voice and others’ sound like? What does it sound like when you eat?
Saturday/ Shabbat is taste. On this day, the structure changes a little. On this day, at lunch, just be conscious of eating at the beginning of the meal, especially be very focused when you eat the first thing of the day. Concentrate on where the food has come from and what had to happen for it to get to you to nourish you. Concentrate on how it will nourish your body and help you to continue to live and do your work on this earth. How will you use the energy from this food? Eat slowly and chew the food well. Put the fork down between bites and don’t eat blindly. Taste the food, etc.
It is a good idea to log your feelings and experiences from the day before going to bed. Notice if the five minutes at night feels different than the five minutes in the morning. Each week, notice if the way the exercise feels changes for you.
Since we are put on this earth in order to do work, to awaken consciousness and awareness, we do not want to waste time. Rather, we want every action to be the conscious placement of another piece of glass in the mosaic of our life, and each of our personal mosaics come together to create the mosaic of true Reality with a big R. When complete, the mosaic of Reality will be like a stained glass window to the world. The stained glass depicts a picture of Reality, of Oneness, of God, of the truth of where we all came from and where we are going. Before the stained glass mosaic is completed, however, the window is clear. The clear window means that Reality is transparent, and a person could easily look through the window without noticing the glass/ a person could easily look at the world and look through the existence of a greater purpose, of a creator, of the interconnectedness of all, and think that what he sees through the window is all there is… just a bunch on lonely trees blowin’ in the wind… The mosaic that we create via our actions reveals the beautiful design through which the world exists, and it reveals to us that there is a creator, and that the creator is that which was, that which is, and that which will be forever, without restraint of time. The creator is every thing and no thing at the same time. It cannot be described. It is the creative energy, the flow, the force, the soul, the name, etcetera. It (the creator) hid itself and pulled back a little in order to create a space in which creation could exist. Now, through billions of years of evolution (from human perspective) we have come from being with It (the creator) as the only existence, to becoming mineral life, plant life, animal life, and finally human life. As humans, on the one hand, we are farther from God than the rock because the rock is only BEing. The rock is constantly present. As humans, we are distracted by and caught up in physicality, our ego, our emotions, and our intellect. But as humans, we can reach a higher consciousness than the rock due to the very intellect that sometimes can distract us. We have the ability to elevate physicality and use our minds to bring us, as humans, back up to the place of BEing, and to wake up from our sleep and from the distractions of the world, and to realize that it is all One. We must realize that on the one hand, everything is perfect and nothing needs to be changed, and on the other hand, we have so much work to do here in order to reveal the truth about the Oneness.
But HOW DO WE WAKE UP? Spiritual practice is necessary. For me, I practice yoga. Many people also use mantra. Sometimes I use the mantra, “I release everything to Hashem (the universe, the creator, God); I own nothing.” And also today when I was being tortured at the dentist for three hours, “There is no pleasure. No pain. It’s just a sensation.” These are my two examples. I also am Jewish and practice Judaism. I use the teachings of torah and their wisdom to help direct me. I use the teachings (for example, Shabbat) as a spiritual practice to help elevate my awareness of God and of what my work is here in this world. But I want more. I want ooooober consciousness. We have come up with an exercise to help elevate consciousness.
The exercise
The exercise is one week long. After one week, it should be repeated again for three more weeks to equal one month, at least. Each day of the week is dedicated to one of the five senses, sight, smell, touch, hearing, and taste, and also breath and speech.
The weekly schedule is as follows:
Sunday – Breath.
Monday – Vision
Tuesday – Speech
Wednesday – Smell
Thursday – Touch
Friday – Hearing
Saturday – Taste/ eating
The daily schedule is as follows: I will use Sunday as an example, but the basic structure is the same each day. Sunday is breath. For five minutes in the morning (you should set an alarm) before going out, spend five minutes on focused breathing. Watch the breath while sitting down with your eyes closed. If you know any other breath exercises, you may want to practice them. Notice what part of your body you are breathing from/into (belly or chest) and where you send your breath. Practice sending your breath to every part, every cell, of your body. Send the breath to your kidneys and to any place that is in pain or seems to lack a flow of energy. At one o’clock and five o’clock, continue doing whatever you happen to be doing, but for the next twenty minutes, also focus on the breath. As you continue doing whatever you were doing at that time, notice how you are breathing. Are the breaths full and deep or short and shallow? After twenty minutes, you do not have to focus on the breath as much, but ideally the awareness will linger with you. Then, at night before going to bed, do another five minutes of focused breathing like in the morning.
On Monday, the day to concentrate on our vision, the daily structure is the same. Five minutes in the morning and before bed of focused concentration on vision, and twenty minutes of heightened awareness at one and five, while continuing to do whatever you were doing. For vision, notice the things around you, objects and people alike, and see them without judgment. Try to see the soul of the object. See the object as it is without its name and connotations. Notice colors. See things as a collection of colors. Colors are reflections of light. See the object as a collection of reflected light. Also look at your own body and see it for what it is, without judgment and with gratitude.
Tuesday is speech. In the morning, pronounce your prayers aloud and clearly or pick a spiritual writing or teaching or even poetry to read out loud. While you should be focused on speech the entire day, you may set the alarm at one and five to remind yourself and refocus. Try to avoid idle speech and talking badly about others. Notice how you speak to people. What is your tone? How do you react to what others speak to you? Do you use words to fuel or diffuse conflict? Are your words honest or misleading? At night, again read something out loud or pray out loud.
Wednesday is smell. In them morning before going out, take a spice or essential oil or herb and focus on smelling it for a few minutes. Smell without judgment or preconceived notions. Perhaps you will grab a spice from the cabinet without reading which spice it is. At one and five, remind yourself to notice smalls. When you eat, smell the food first. Notice what different places smell like, etc. At night, do a few minutes meditating on the same spice as in the morning.
Thursday is touch. In the morning and at night, the five minutes should be spent touching your body and some natural object like a seashell, a plant, water, or a stone. Touch the object with your eyes closed. Touch your face with your eyes closed. Notice the subtle details of texture. At one and five again remind yourself to refocus on touch. Notice throughout the day when you catch yourself touching (an object, your hair, scratching your skin, etc) unconsciously. Notice what your body is touching as well (your tush on the seat, for example). When touching a person, do it with intention and not mindlessly.
Friday is hearing. In the morning, step outside or open the window and be quiet and spend five minutes just listening to what your hear. Don’t judge. If it is very quiet in your room, then notice what does your breath sound like? What does the silence sound like? During the day, notice different sounds. What does your voice and others’ sound like? What does it sound like when you eat?
Saturday/ Shabbat is taste. On this day, the structure changes a little. On this day, at lunch, just be conscious of eating at the beginning of the meal, especially be very focused when you eat the first thing of the day. Concentrate on where the food has come from and what had to happen for it to get to you to nourish you. Concentrate on how it will nourish your body and help you to continue to live and do your work on this earth. How will you use the energy from this food? Eat slowly and chew the food well. Put the fork down between bites and don’t eat blindly. Taste the food, etc.
It is a good idea to log your feelings and experiences from the day before going to bed. Notice if the five minutes at night feels different than the five minutes in the morning. Each week, notice if the way the exercise feels changes for you.
Wednesday, June 23, 2010
Upon Meeting Someone New
What if, when we met people, instead of asking, "where do you live?" "where are you from" "what do you do (for a living)?" we asked, "what makes you laugh so hard that your knees buckle, you fall to the floor, and tears pour out of your eyes?" "Who do you love very much?" "What makes your heart sink heavily and why?" What if instead of shaking hands, we simply look into each others' eyes with a gentle nod. Do you feel the difference between hands meeting and eyes meeting? There is a difference. What if instead of, "what is your name?" we said, "who are you?" Maybe we should try. Awaiting your reply to... shiframash@gmail.com
Friday, June 11, 2010
Feeding a piece of bread to every single person
What are you DOing here?
There is so much to do in this world. We want to do something real, fix something, feed someone, and actually see how we have positively impacted the world. How do we know what to do? There are billions of people on this earth. How do I, one person, take on such a big task as to help every single person? There are two ways that we can "give a piece of bread"/ help the other members of this world. The first way is that God acts through us, and in this way, which I will explain further, we really can reach and affect the lives if every single human being. The second way we act in this world is more contained to who I will physically help, who I can physically reach out to and hand a piece of bread, be it through writing, music, cooking, care-taking, educating, or whatever your particular medium of choice may be. I want to look closer at the first way that we can affect others in this world. God acts though people. What does this mean? Through our actions we can be feeding every single person in this world a bite of bread or a bite of poison. Through our actions, when we at good, kind, and generous, God responds by judging the world with an equal amount of kindness and generosity, but if someone acts badly, hatefully, or immorally, so then through that person's actions, God is judging the world harshly. That man is created in God's image means hat God acts in this world through our actions. When we act properly, our actions add a positive energy into the world, and that is God responding with positive judgment. That man is created in His image means that we, in our microcosm of existence, which is this world, are like miniature 'gods' with limited ability, but with abilit to act in this world none-the-less. God wants to see how we will rule, how we will judge, how we will act, and He will rule, judge, and act accordingly. That man is created in God's image means that God gives man the opportunity to be mini-creators by joining with Him in the act of creating a child. Then, as a parent, man acts as a pseudo 'god' over that baby, over man's atmosphere, over this world. God responds through man's actions. If we care for each other and the world, so then God judges kindly through our very actions of kindness, but if we treat each other harshly and hatefully, God judges harshly, through our harsh actions. Therefore, every action we do is extremely important, even if it is just a matter of how will I speak to my family members in the privacy of my own home where no one will hear me because even though no one else may hear, if I speak kindly, I am adding an energy of kindness to the world and to God's response in His own judgment. If I speak harshly, I am adding that much severity to how God will judge. If God is judging the world with kindness, love, and generosity, then every person will be effected positively. If God is judging with more severity, then every person will also be effected accordingly. If I do my best to tilt the scale to the positive side with every action that I do, every thought that I think, and every word that I speak, then I am doing what I can to give a bite of bread to every single human being, even those who I cannot reach with my own physical two hands.
There is so much to do in this world. We want to do something real, fix something, feed someone, and actually see how we have positively impacted the world. How do we know what to do? There are billions of people on this earth. How do I, one person, take on such a big task as to help every single person? There are two ways that we can "give a piece of bread"/ help the other members of this world. The first way is that God acts through us, and in this way, which I will explain further, we really can reach and affect the lives if every single human being. The second way we act in this world is more contained to who I will physically help, who I can physically reach out to and hand a piece of bread, be it through writing, music, cooking, care-taking, educating, or whatever your particular medium of choice may be. I want to look closer at the first way that we can affect others in this world. God acts though people. What does this mean? Through our actions we can be feeding every single person in this world a bite of bread or a bite of poison. Through our actions, when we at good, kind, and generous, God responds by judging the world with an equal amount of kindness and generosity, but if someone acts badly, hatefully, or immorally, so then through that person's actions, God is judging the world harshly. That man is created in God's image means hat God acts in this world through our actions. When we act properly, our actions add a positive energy into the world, and that is God responding with positive judgment. That man is created in His image means that we, in our microcosm of existence, which is this world, are like miniature 'gods' with limited ability, but with abilit to act in this world none-the-less. God wants to see how we will rule, how we will judge, how we will act, and He will rule, judge, and act accordingly. That man is created in God's image means that God gives man the opportunity to be mini-creators by joining with Him in the act of creating a child. Then, as a parent, man acts as a pseudo 'god' over that baby, over man's atmosphere, over this world. God responds through man's actions. If we care for each other and the world, so then God judges kindly through our very actions of kindness, but if we treat each other harshly and hatefully, God judges harshly, through our harsh actions. Therefore, every action we do is extremely important, even if it is just a matter of how will I speak to my family members in the privacy of my own home where no one will hear me because even though no one else may hear, if I speak kindly, I am adding an energy of kindness to the world and to God's response in His own judgment. If I speak harshly, I am adding that much severity to how God will judge. If God is judging the world with kindness, love, and generosity, then every person will be effected positively. If God is judging with more severity, then every person will also be effected accordingly. If I do my best to tilt the scale to the positive side with every action that I do, every thought that I think, and every word that I speak, then I am doing what I can to give a bite of bread to every single human being, even those who I cannot reach with my own physical two hands.
Thursday, June 3, 2010
Hidden in our vision
SO that's how it works! The world. ha. Our eyes give it away in the way that they function. I am laying on the earth, and my chest is on the ground. I am in love with it. In Love. With the earth, the world, with life, with existence. In love. I am laying on the ground and looking in front of me. There is my hand and a ring on my finger, right near my face. Beyond the hand, there is a wildflower, and beyond that, a tree. My eyes can focus on the ring, the wildflower, or the tree. I simply have to adjust something in the way my eye is perceiving. It is an easy switch. I just have to change what the eye is focusing on. If I focus on the ring, the wildflower and the tree are still there, but they are blurry. Although I cannot really see them clearly or well, I am aware that they are there. If I focus on the tree, the same is true but of the wildflower and the ring, etc. It's an easy switch. That's the way the world works. We may be focused on the obvious or the less obvious, on that which is right in front of us, or on that which is broader, bigger, or more distanced from us. We may be focused on the minute details of our life in this particular moment, or we may be focusing on big spiritual concepts like God and existence or the future. Whatever we are focused on, all of these things are still there. When I focus on the ring, the wildflower and tree are still there. When I focus on God, I am still here, and when I focus on the details of my life like cooking food and showering my body, God is still there. Also, despite what our focus may be on in the particular moment, we should keep everything else within our consciousness, just like when I am focused on the ring, the tree and wildflower are still within my perception, even though they are not the focus at that time.
We should all practice to be able to switch our focus/ mode of consciousness as easily as we can switch the focus in our vision. As easily as I can change my focus from the ring to the tree, I should practice to be able to shift my focus from that which is right in front of my face, the ring, the mundane tasks of life, to the bigger picture behind it all, the tree, to the God energy force that runs through everything.
We are so free. If we can just tap in to the Truth behind it all, and if we can only be able to consciously be aware of all layers of consciousness simultaneously, even when we are in one, be aware of the others, even when I'm looking at the ring, know that the flower and tree are just as real, then we are so free. Because once we can tap into Truth, anything else that anyone tells us to do, a friend, enemy, or acquaintance, a teacher or a student, society, the fashion industry, the fads, etc, no one can have any hold on me, and if they want to persuade me to do something, I can check in with that Truth that I am able to reach, and if what they tell me to do conflicts wit that Truth, then I won't even feel tempted to give in, because once we are aware of Truth, we are free. But how do we become aware? Simple (well, not so simple), but it starts with a simple eye exercise. Try it: focus on something right in front of your nose, then without moving anything, switch the focus in your eyes to notice what is just behind, and then again to what is in the background. Got it? Now try it with life and existence. Keep practicing ;)
Another thing I noticed that runs along the same vein as what I wrote above: you know how sometimes even when a light bulb is turned off, it still has a slight glow against the darkness? I was laying in my bed and noticed this phenomena with the light bulb that hung from the ceiling. Ok, another thing, have you even noticed how sometimes, when you are star gazing, if you look directly at one of the distant shining dots, it seems to disappear, but if you look just to the side of it, you can see it again? There is a tiny blind spot in the very center of the eye, and so if we look at something that small straight on, we can't see it at all. So, to tie these two thoughts together, I was noticing the not-completely-dark, turned-off light-bulb, and I was having the distant-star-blind-spot effect with the not-completely-dark, turned-off light-bulb. It was bizarre. I had never noticed the blind-spot effect with something so big! A star is a tiny dot so far away, but this light-bulb is not so small, and it was very close to me, almost right over my head. What was so strange is that I was one hundred percent certain that the light bulb was there. If I looked to the side, I could see it. The light bulb was right there, so close I could have touched if if I had stood up! But if I looked right at it, I could not see it at all, not one bit, not even a hint. It was as if the light bulb was not there at all. The point is to say that what is reality is more than simply what the eye can see. There is more to reality that what we can pick up with our eye. Our eye sees only a certain amount, and then our brain filters what the eye sees so that we register even less. When we look around, we don't see the tiny micro-particles floating around in the air. When we look outside, maybe we don't see it so obviously that there is a Creative Energy Force that is flowing through every single thing, but we should remember this lesson, that there is more to reality than what the eye can capture. Even though I could not see the light bulb, I did not doubt for a moment that it existed and that it was there right in front of me the entire time. So, even when we hit a dark spot in our lives and cannot see the light bulb, the camouflaged but ever present Godly force flowing through creation, we should never loose faith and should always remember that it is always there, right there in front of us, even if we cannot see it clearly.
We should all practice to be able to switch our focus/ mode of consciousness as easily as we can switch the focus in our vision. As easily as I can change my focus from the ring to the tree, I should practice to be able to shift my focus from that which is right in front of my face, the ring, the mundane tasks of life, to the bigger picture behind it all, the tree, to the God energy force that runs through everything.
We are so free. If we can just tap in to the Truth behind it all, and if we can only be able to consciously be aware of all layers of consciousness simultaneously, even when we are in one, be aware of the others, even when I'm looking at the ring, know that the flower and tree are just as real, then we are so free. Because once we can tap into Truth, anything else that anyone tells us to do, a friend, enemy, or acquaintance, a teacher or a student, society, the fashion industry, the fads, etc, no one can have any hold on me, and if they want to persuade me to do something, I can check in with that Truth that I am able to reach, and if what they tell me to do conflicts wit that Truth, then I won't even feel tempted to give in, because once we are aware of Truth, we are free. But how do we become aware? Simple (well, not so simple), but it starts with a simple eye exercise. Try it: focus on something right in front of your nose, then without moving anything, switch the focus in your eyes to notice what is just behind, and then again to what is in the background. Got it? Now try it with life and existence. Keep practicing ;)
Another thing I noticed that runs along the same vein as what I wrote above: you know how sometimes even when a light bulb is turned off, it still has a slight glow against the darkness? I was laying in my bed and noticed this phenomena with the light bulb that hung from the ceiling. Ok, another thing, have you even noticed how sometimes, when you are star gazing, if you look directly at one of the distant shining dots, it seems to disappear, but if you look just to the side of it, you can see it again? There is a tiny blind spot in the very center of the eye, and so if we look at something that small straight on, we can't see it at all. So, to tie these two thoughts together, I was noticing the not-completely-dark, turned-off light-bulb, and I was having the distant-star-blind-spot effect with the not-completely-dark, turned-off light-bulb. It was bizarre. I had never noticed the blind-spot effect with something so big! A star is a tiny dot so far away, but this light-bulb is not so small, and it was very close to me, almost right over my head. What was so strange is that I was one hundred percent certain that the light bulb was there. If I looked to the side, I could see it. The light bulb was right there, so close I could have touched if if I had stood up! But if I looked right at it, I could not see it at all, not one bit, not even a hint. It was as if the light bulb was not there at all. The point is to say that what is reality is more than simply what the eye can see. There is more to reality that what we can pick up with our eye. Our eye sees only a certain amount, and then our brain filters what the eye sees so that we register even less. When we look around, we don't see the tiny micro-particles floating around in the air. When we look outside, maybe we don't see it so obviously that there is a Creative Energy Force that is flowing through every single thing, but we should remember this lesson, that there is more to reality than what the eye can capture. Even though I could not see the light bulb, I did not doubt for a moment that it existed and that it was there right in front of me the entire time. So, even when we hit a dark spot in our lives and cannot see the light bulb, the camouflaged but ever present Godly force flowing through creation, we should never loose faith and should always remember that it is always there, right there in front of us, even if we cannot see it clearly.
Monday, April 19, 2010
Today I am Born.
I was standing in the middle of a circle. Every way I turned, there were an infinite amount of paths to go down. There are so many options, so many oportunities, all of them good, all of them tempting, all of them leading me in different direction, and I can only walk one way at a time, one step at a time.
When I was at a friend's house for breakfast, and her friend said, "I'm going to do yam le yam tomorrow," (a trail that goes from the Mediterranean, across the width of Northern Israel, to the lake Kinneret in Tiberias), I said, "Okay, let's do it." And so the next day we were gathering seashells at the Mediterranean and setting our intentions for the journey. The truth is that every physical thing that happened, every thing that we experienced on a real, tangible level, was very clearly a reflection of a spiritual counterpart. The intention I had was that I would get in touch with nature, with myself, and with Hashem, and therefore find clarity about which Derech to chose so that, by the time we got to the Kinneret, and it would be time for me to return to the circle of infinite possibilities, I would know which way to go. The trip was the setting up of a compass in the middle of the circle-- a compass made of wildflowers, and when we were finally sleeping on the shore of lake Kinneret, three girls sleeping inside a circle of stones that we created as our circle of safety, there was a point where the wind was blowing so hard that it woke me. That was the wind that was blowing the hand of the compass. And when I woke up, the wild flower compass hand was pointing to Tzvat.
The Journey itself was a living torah, was very reflective of my life. When we are born, we come from the place of the infinite, the place of Hashem, of the everything, the oneness, the place of torah, the place of water, the womb, the sea... We start at a place of clarity, but as we grow up, as we live a little longer in this world, as we walk further down the path of life, further from our starting point of clarity and infinity, further from our mother's womb, from the sea, we experience obstacles and come to forks in the road. People we meet, social expectations, and every experience create distractions that can easily clouds our clarity. We started our journey at the sea, the infinite pool of water. As we journeyed, we found ourselves dealing with many obstacles, large and small, and in order to get to out destination, the Kinneret, the water, we had to first loose sight of the sea and find our way through land.
The goal of the journey was to go from the water, through land, and eventually end in a place of water and clarity. This journey is a great challenge in life. As we grow older, we must maintain sight of the sea and hold on to that point of clarity about who we are, even as we experience many distractions in life.
When we began, we were walking down a dry river bed. It was difficult because, despite the heat, there were so many rocks to step over. Obstacles. Also, our vision was obstructed by the walls of the river. But eventually we made it out, and when we were at a cross roads, and this happened every single time, we met someone who could guide us in the right direction, but they could only guide us so far. We walked from the river bed, to a banana plantation, to a mountain side, to a forest. At times the path was so difficult that, in order for us to move forward, we had to look at our feet in oder to get past the stones and thorns and bushes and ditches, but when we looked up and saw what we had just walked through, it was beautiful nature and the sea way in the distance. It reminded me of Rebbe Nachman's tale of the king's palace. The king is sitting in his room, and the prince is trying to find his father, but there are so many obstacles, mazes, corridors, empty doorways, etc. but when the prince finally finds the way through everything to his father's chamber, he looks back and only sees a magnificent garden.
Even though, on the one hand, we are in this world, and we really did have to sweat our way through the forest (with a pack on my back the made my hips turn bright red), step by step, in order to get to the sea at the other side, all of the obstacles were really just beautiful nature. I saw them as obstacles as I was walking over them, but that was just an illusion. The obstacles were really a garden, and I realize that the trail to clarity that I desire is really right in front of me. I just have to open my eyes and see the clear path instead of seeing the obstacles.
After we finished the yam le Yam trail, I went back to Tzvat and I was there for my hebrew birthday. Tiferet shebe Tiferet. That is the day I was born, but really, we are born again every day, every moment. Every breath is a gift.
When I was at a friend's house for breakfast, and her friend said, "I'm going to do yam le yam tomorrow," (a trail that goes from the Mediterranean, across the width of Northern Israel, to the lake Kinneret in Tiberias), I said, "Okay, let's do it." And so the next day we were gathering seashells at the Mediterranean and setting our intentions for the journey. The truth is that every physical thing that happened, every thing that we experienced on a real, tangible level, was very clearly a reflection of a spiritual counterpart. The intention I had was that I would get in touch with nature, with myself, and with Hashem, and therefore find clarity about which Derech to chose so that, by the time we got to the Kinneret, and it would be time for me to return to the circle of infinite possibilities, I would know which way to go. The trip was the setting up of a compass in the middle of the circle-- a compass made of wildflowers, and when we were finally sleeping on the shore of lake Kinneret, three girls sleeping inside a circle of stones that we created as our circle of safety, there was a point where the wind was blowing so hard that it woke me. That was the wind that was blowing the hand of the compass. And when I woke up, the wild flower compass hand was pointing to Tzvat.
The Journey itself was a living torah, was very reflective of my life. When we are born, we come from the place of the infinite, the place of Hashem, of the everything, the oneness, the place of torah, the place of water, the womb, the sea... We start at a place of clarity, but as we grow up, as we live a little longer in this world, as we walk further down the path of life, further from our starting point of clarity and infinity, further from our mother's womb, from the sea, we experience obstacles and come to forks in the road. People we meet, social expectations, and every experience create distractions that can easily clouds our clarity. We started our journey at the sea, the infinite pool of water. As we journeyed, we found ourselves dealing with many obstacles, large and small, and in order to get to out destination, the Kinneret, the water, we had to first loose sight of the sea and find our way through land.
The goal of the journey was to go from the water, through land, and eventually end in a place of water and clarity. This journey is a great challenge in life. As we grow older, we must maintain sight of the sea and hold on to that point of clarity about who we are, even as we experience many distractions in life.
When we began, we were walking down a dry river bed. It was difficult because, despite the heat, there were so many rocks to step over. Obstacles. Also, our vision was obstructed by the walls of the river. But eventually we made it out, and when we were at a cross roads, and this happened every single time, we met someone who could guide us in the right direction, but they could only guide us so far. We walked from the river bed, to a banana plantation, to a mountain side, to a forest. At times the path was so difficult that, in order for us to move forward, we had to look at our feet in oder to get past the stones and thorns and bushes and ditches, but when we looked up and saw what we had just walked through, it was beautiful nature and the sea way in the distance. It reminded me of Rebbe Nachman's tale of the king's palace. The king is sitting in his room, and the prince is trying to find his father, but there are so many obstacles, mazes, corridors, empty doorways, etc. but when the prince finally finds the way through everything to his father's chamber, he looks back and only sees a magnificent garden.
Even though, on the one hand, we are in this world, and we really did have to sweat our way through the forest (with a pack on my back the made my hips turn bright red), step by step, in order to get to the sea at the other side, all of the obstacles were really just beautiful nature. I saw them as obstacles as I was walking over them, but that was just an illusion. The obstacles were really a garden, and I realize that the trail to clarity that I desire is really right in front of me. I just have to open my eyes and see the clear path instead of seeing the obstacles.
After we finished the yam le Yam trail, I went back to Tzvat and I was there for my hebrew birthday. Tiferet shebe Tiferet. That is the day I was born, but really, we are born again every day, every moment. Every breath is a gift.
Wednesday, March 24, 2010
Freedom: the intimacy between body and soul
You already know, but Nissan is the month of freedom. You know the most free we can ever be is when we are ourselves, when we can connect to our true inner selves and the desire of the deepest depths of our souls. If we can connect to that place within us, and if we can have the strength to act on what we know in that place, then we are so free.
It is a place free of ego, free of jealousy, free of competition, free of guilt, free of obligation, free of false desires, so free that it is just your soul standing there naked inside your body, with nothing in the way except the moonlight because Pesach is on the full moon, and as we sit there eating the Matzah, body and soul come together in a beautiful intimacy that they have so longed for throughout the year, but there was too much chumetz in the way, too much pettiness, slavery, dirty clothes. So I bless you all, all of us, that we can be free, truly free, and that we can be in touch with that place inside of us where we are free, where we are who we really are, and where we are doing what we are really meant to be doing, and I bless us also that when we do connect with this true part of ourselves, we have the courage, the strength, and the means to be ourselves and to be free.
It is a place free of ego, free of jealousy, free of competition, free of guilt, free of obligation, free of false desires, so free that it is just your soul standing there naked inside your body, with nothing in the way except the moonlight because Pesach is on the full moon, and as we sit there eating the Matzah, body and soul come together in a beautiful intimacy that they have so longed for throughout the year, but there was too much chumetz in the way, too much pettiness, slavery, dirty clothes. So I bless you all, all of us, that we can be free, truly free, and that we can be in touch with that place inside of us where we are free, where we are who we really are, and where we are doing what we are really meant to be doing, and I bless us also that when we do connect with this true part of ourselves, we have the courage, the strength, and the means to be ourselves and to be free.
Wednesday, March 10, 2010
On Wheat Allergies Becoming more and more Common
Sleeping on beds of challah, like clouds, in a field of wheat, like wheat the way earth made her, like Hashem intended, wheat before she started turning against us because of what we've done to her.
She wants to forgive us, but she'll continue to punish our children until we ask it of her, sincerely, from our hearts, our souls, the way we ask forgiveness on Yom Kippur. On Yom Kippur, we don't eat. We fast. We restrict ourselves from food so we can ask forgiveness and be forgiven. So the earth wants us to ask forgiveness of her, and until we do, she'll withhold her wheat and we won't have bread to eat. We'll fast from bread until we say we're sorry and make a tikkun on our actions that have harmed her.
She wants to forgive us, but she'll continue to punish our children until we ask it of her, sincerely, from our hearts, our souls, the way we ask forgiveness on Yom Kippur. On Yom Kippur, we don't eat. We fast. We restrict ourselves from food so we can ask forgiveness and be forgiven. So the earth wants us to ask forgiveness of her, and until we do, she'll withhold her wheat and we won't have bread to eat. We'll fast from bread until we say we're sorry and make a tikkun on our actions that have harmed her.
Meditations from the desert: Breathe the world into being.
There are big, tall, powerful walls of rock in the desert. They are towering and strong and yet with the slightest flick of my finger, the wall poofs into dust-- it's not there-- it disappears into the air. It is so fragile. It's existence so dependent. I realize that the rock wall is just a collection of piled up sand and no more, but it's paradoxical because on the one hand, the wall does exist. I can't walk through it. It is there. I'll have to walk around it. But as soon as I brush the surface with my finger, it dissolves into nothingness, into a puff of dust.
Creation is this way. We are this way. We think we're so real, so strong, so invincible, indestructible, and it's true. I can't walk through you. But sometimes we have such egos, we think we're bigger than the towering rock wall. We're even bigger.
For me, it exists, but if I tap it with my finger, it dissolves to dust.
But what about when a person dies?
Flick of a finger. Dust. He dissolves into sand. And maybe that sand turns into a grand rock wall towering towards the desert moon. Or maybe it gets blown onto the street of Yerushalayim and is stepped on by the feet of holy people. Malchus.
My body is a shoe.
A real tower, a real body, dissolves into sand with the flick of a finger.
It went like this: when he dies, he dissolved into sand. In life, he was a pillar. But he saw the flick of a finger, and he heard a deep inhalation not coming from himself, and he saw that he was alone. He heard a heart beating like a drum. When the finger flicked, something sticky caught on to him. For a moment, he was lost in a dark maze. It caught on to him and pulled him out, but the body crumbled into sand.
She sat on top of a pile of sand in the desert. She knew what every grain of sand implied. For her the sand was created. For a tiny particle of sand, she was created.
The ground under your feet looks solid, but it's not. It looks hard, but it crumbles when you step.
A few sticks can make a big fire. A breath can make it grow to higher heights.
Breathe the world into being and inhale it back in.
Creation is this way. We are this way. We think we're so real, so strong, so invincible, indestructible, and it's true. I can't walk through you. But sometimes we have such egos, we think we're bigger than the towering rock wall. We're even bigger.
For me, it exists, but if I tap it with my finger, it dissolves to dust.
But what about when a person dies?
Flick of a finger. Dust. He dissolves into sand. And maybe that sand turns into a grand rock wall towering towards the desert moon. Or maybe it gets blown onto the street of Yerushalayim and is stepped on by the feet of holy people. Malchus.
My body is a shoe.
A real tower, a real body, dissolves into sand with the flick of a finger.
It went like this: when he dies, he dissolved into sand. In life, he was a pillar. But he saw the flick of a finger, and he heard a deep inhalation not coming from himself, and he saw that he was alone. He heard a heart beating like a drum. When the finger flicked, something sticky caught on to him. For a moment, he was lost in a dark maze. It caught on to him and pulled him out, but the body crumbled into sand.
She sat on top of a pile of sand in the desert. She knew what every grain of sand implied. For her the sand was created. For a tiny particle of sand, she was created.
The ground under your feet looks solid, but it's not. It looks hard, but it crumbles when you step.
A few sticks can make a big fire. A breath can make it grow to higher heights.
Breathe the world into being and inhale it back in.
Thursday, February 25, 2010
Drinking water in the Light
My spine supported by the trunk of the tree. Root down,
sinking through the ground and holding onto the sky with my hair
sliding
underground
a doe drinks water from the pond.
A jonquil. the soul flower. splash
of yellow in the dark.
PURIM-- turn the world upside-down.
water in the sky. yellow flower like the sun.
roots become branches; branches turn into roots.
The doe no longer hiding underground, drinking in the dark.
Now we are drinking from the water in pure light.
Turn the world on its head.
frost melts. water turns.
is so sweet. intoxicating. like wine
until you forgot the difference between blessed Haman
blessed Mordecai because no one is cursed any longer
now that the water is out
and you know what it means that it's one.
sinking through the ground and holding onto the sky with my hair
sliding
underground
a doe drinks water from the pond.
A jonquil. the soul flower. splash
of yellow in the dark.
PURIM-- turn the world upside-down.
water in the sky. yellow flower like the sun.
roots become branches; branches turn into roots.
The doe no longer hiding underground, drinking in the dark.
Now we are drinking from the water in pure light.
Turn the world on its head.
frost melts. water turns.
is so sweet. intoxicating. like wine
until you forgot the difference between blessed Haman
blessed Mordecai because no one is cursed any longer
now that the water is out
and you know what it means that it's one.
Raise your hands in the air!
On Purim, we read Parshat Zachor, " Remember what Amalek perpetrated against you on the way when you were going out of Egypt. When they chanced upon you en route and struck down your appendage-- all the feeble ones behind you-- and you were exhausted and wearied, and they had no fear of God. When Hashem, your God, has given you repose from all your enemies all around, in the land that Hashem, your God, is giving you as a territory to inherit, you shall obliterate the memory of Amalek from beneath the sky; do not forget." (Devarim, Ki Teitzei; 18-19)
So what is the passage about? What did Amalek do to us that we must remember? And also, why the reminder not to forget that we are to obliterate the memory of Amalek? So to understand what Parshat Zachor is speaking about, we read yud-zayin of parshat Beshalach on Purim. In that Parsha, Amalek attacks us in the desert after we leave Mitzrayim.
There are a couple of main themes to look at that can open this story up for us and teach us something very important. Let's look at the water and thirst as well as the mentioning of hands.
"They camped at Rephidim." Rephidim comes from, "Raphu Yaddaim," meaning their hands were weak. And in this place where their hands were weak, there was no water for them to drink.We know that water is a metaphore for Torah. Also, this event occurs shortly before the revelation of the torah at Sinai. In the simple understanding of this event, B'nai Yisroel is being grumpy and complaining for water. I want to suggest that they were not just whining, however, but that really something very deep was going on, and that Hashem set up B'nai Yisroel so that the events would purposefully happen in this way.
The Ishbitzer Rebbe teaches in sefer Bais Yaacov that we can have two types of relationships with God. We can relate to him with our hands, reaching out and holding on to him. In this way, we relate to him through our hands and through our actions and mitzvot. Our hands are strong. OR we can relate to him in a way in which he is guiding us from a hidden place high above our minds' capacity to understand. When we have this type of relationship with Hashem, it may seem that he is not with us. We might feel an emptiness and a thirst for Hashem's hand. In this case, we might also use the excuse that he is guiding us from such a high place that we don't have to do anything because we don't understand and because maybe he is there, but so far away. If we do say this, our actions and our 'hands' become weak. When we are weak, we get to a place of thirst. We thirst for meaning, we thirst to fill a void, we thirst for God's hand to be close and known to us. For example, on Purim, we give shlach manos. Reb Shlomo teaches that "yadid" (Hebrew for friends) is like "yad-yad" (hand-hand). Sometimes we put out our hand and we don't want shlach manos. We don't want any thing. We don't want tzeddakah. We just want our friend's hand.
In a similar way, at Rephidim, maybe what we were complaining about was that we didn't want God's far-away guidance. We wanted to feel his hand in our hand. We wanted water, or torah, but Hashem would put us through some tests first. Before we get the torah, we have to fight Amalek.
Just before we fight Amalek, and before even getting a preliminary taste of water, we ask, "Is Hashem with us or is he not?" The Hebrew word used for "not" is "Ayin." Ayin means more than just "not." Ayin means the apex of the yud, or rather, the part of Hashem that is there, but far beyond our knowledge or choice. We are asking, God, are you the far away God or are you here with us holding our hand?
We were thirsty. We wanted torah, but if you are the far away God, than maybe it doesn't really matter what we do down here one way or the other. As soon as we begin to think that way, that is precisely when Amalek attacks. Amalek, however, takes these thoughts to the extreme He says, not only does it not matter, but nothing matters. You think God is just distant? Stop fooling yourself. God is not even there. None of it matters. Give it up.
Only after we fight off these thoughts will our thirst really be quenched and we can receive the torah.
During the battle, we see that when Moshe's hands are raised, (as an expression of faith and connection to Hashem), Israel prevails, but when his hands fall, Amalek prevails. What is "yadav emunah," or "hands of faith," as Moshe's hands are called? Besides the obvious expression of reaching up to God, the phrase also shows that sometimes we first have to act with our hands in order to have or develop the faith. But if our hands are weak, we loose faith, and Amalek attacks.
Nevertheless, God set things up to play out in this way so that we would have to really thirst for him and for torah before we would receive it. We would not just get torah, but we would have to fight for our faith, fight to keep our hands raised in the air and fight to keep Amalek out and to obliterate him forever.
Going back to parshat Zachor, we see that this was is not yet over, but that right now in the present it is time for us to really fight this battle. It says, "when Hashem your God has given you repose from all your enemies around in the land that Hashem your God is giving you as territory to inherit, you shall obliterate the memory of Amalek from beneath the sky. Do not forget." Now, Hashem has given us the land of Israel. Our enemies surround us and yet, thank God, here I am learning torah in Yerushalayim ir ha Kodesh. So now, more than ever, it is time the time that we are told to obliterate the memory of Amalek. How? Even though Hashem promises "I will totally obliterate the memory of Amalek," we also have to do our work from this end, our hishtadlut. So, when Moshe has his hands raised, Israel prevails. We should learn from this that in order to beat Amalek and evil, we too, have to keep our hands of faith and action, raised. And on Purim, when we give shlach manos, we are holding hands with our friends. In turn, hashem will see our kindness and when he sees our hands raised out to him, he will hold our hand as well.
So what is the passage about? What did Amalek do to us that we must remember? And also, why the reminder not to forget that we are to obliterate the memory of Amalek? So to understand what Parshat Zachor is speaking about, we read yud-zayin of parshat Beshalach on Purim. In that Parsha, Amalek attacks us in the desert after we leave Mitzrayim.
There are a couple of main themes to look at that can open this story up for us and teach us something very important. Let's look at the water and thirst as well as the mentioning of hands.
"They camped at Rephidim." Rephidim comes from, "Raphu Yaddaim," meaning their hands were weak. And in this place where their hands were weak, there was no water for them to drink.We know that water is a metaphore for Torah. Also, this event occurs shortly before the revelation of the torah at Sinai. In the simple understanding of this event, B'nai Yisroel is being grumpy and complaining for water. I want to suggest that they were not just whining, however, but that really something very deep was going on, and that Hashem set up B'nai Yisroel so that the events would purposefully happen in this way.
The Ishbitzer Rebbe teaches in sefer Bais Yaacov that we can have two types of relationships with God. We can relate to him with our hands, reaching out and holding on to him. In this way, we relate to him through our hands and through our actions and mitzvot. Our hands are strong. OR we can relate to him in a way in which he is guiding us from a hidden place high above our minds' capacity to understand. When we have this type of relationship with Hashem, it may seem that he is not with us. We might feel an emptiness and a thirst for Hashem's hand. In this case, we might also use the excuse that he is guiding us from such a high place that we don't have to do anything because we don't understand and because maybe he is there, but so far away. If we do say this, our actions and our 'hands' become weak. When we are weak, we get to a place of thirst. We thirst for meaning, we thirst to fill a void, we thirst for God's hand to be close and known to us. For example, on Purim, we give shlach manos. Reb Shlomo teaches that "yadid" (Hebrew for friends) is like "yad-yad" (hand-hand). Sometimes we put out our hand and we don't want shlach manos. We don't want any thing. We don't want tzeddakah. We just want our friend's hand.
In a similar way, at Rephidim, maybe what we were complaining about was that we didn't want God's far-away guidance. We wanted to feel his hand in our hand. We wanted water, or torah, but Hashem would put us through some tests first. Before we get the torah, we have to fight Amalek.
Just before we fight Amalek, and before even getting a preliminary taste of water, we ask, "Is Hashem with us or is he not?" The Hebrew word used for "not" is "Ayin." Ayin means more than just "not." Ayin means the apex of the yud, or rather, the part of Hashem that is there, but far beyond our knowledge or choice. We are asking, God, are you the far away God or are you here with us holding our hand?
We were thirsty. We wanted torah, but if you are the far away God, than maybe it doesn't really matter what we do down here one way or the other. As soon as we begin to think that way, that is precisely when Amalek attacks. Amalek, however, takes these thoughts to the extreme He says, not only does it not matter, but nothing matters. You think God is just distant? Stop fooling yourself. God is not even there. None of it matters. Give it up.
Only after we fight off these thoughts will our thirst really be quenched and we can receive the torah.
During the battle, we see that when Moshe's hands are raised, (as an expression of faith and connection to Hashem), Israel prevails, but when his hands fall, Amalek prevails. What is "yadav emunah," or "hands of faith," as Moshe's hands are called? Besides the obvious expression of reaching up to God, the phrase also shows that sometimes we first have to act with our hands in order to have or develop the faith. But if our hands are weak, we loose faith, and Amalek attacks.
Nevertheless, God set things up to play out in this way so that we would have to really thirst for him and for torah before we would receive it. We would not just get torah, but we would have to fight for our faith, fight to keep our hands raised in the air and fight to keep Amalek out and to obliterate him forever.
Going back to parshat Zachor, we see that this was is not yet over, but that right now in the present it is time for us to really fight this battle. It says, "when Hashem your God has given you repose from all your enemies around in the land that Hashem your God is giving you as territory to inherit, you shall obliterate the memory of Amalek from beneath the sky. Do not forget." Now, Hashem has given us the land of Israel. Our enemies surround us and yet, thank God, here I am learning torah in Yerushalayim ir ha Kodesh. So now, more than ever, it is time the time that we are told to obliterate the memory of Amalek. How? Even though Hashem promises "I will totally obliterate the memory of Amalek," we also have to do our work from this end, our hishtadlut. So, when Moshe has his hands raised, Israel prevails. We should learn from this that in order to beat Amalek and evil, we too, have to keep our hands of faith and action, raised. And on Purim, when we give shlach manos, we are holding hands with our friends. In turn, hashem will see our kindness and when he sees our hands raised out to him, he will hold our hand as well.
Monday, February 22, 2010
The Deepest Purim
Lately, we are learning a lot about Purim. Here are some of my thoughts that are inspired by teaching from Reb Shlomo, from Rabbi Avraham Sutton and his book "Purim Light," from Sara Idit Sneider's book "Purim Bursts" and from other teachers and teachings as well. One thing that the Purim story teaches us is that Hashem is truly everywhere and in everything, in the good, in Mordechai the tzaddik, and even in the sitra achra, the evil, that which pretends an identity that could be other than hashem, Haman, even there Hashem is present, and not just present, but really that is all there is, so of course we have to love each other, love every thing, and everyone as ourself, because we are all one. Not only that, but in the Likutei Mohoran we also learn that even if someone is evil, there is some small space in them where they did something good, even if it was only once. An example is that maybe there is a thief, but maybe just once when he was a boy his father gave him money to buy a carton of milk. And maybe that one time, he used the money to do as his father asked instead of getting candy with it. So if we see that good part of them, no matter how big or small it is, we place them in a positive space, and it is like magic how they become that part of them that is good, even if it is small. You know the scales of justice? Well when you place someone in your mind in a positive space, you are really placing them on the positive scale. We can change the world with our perception!
Shema Yisroel, if only we could really hear, for just a moment, as we did at Sinai, SHEMA please people of the house of Israel, hear it in your heart that Hashem, the everything, the only, the infinite whose presence is concealed in this world, so concealed that often times it is easy to think that he is not real or is not here, our Gd, that was before creation, during, and will be after and forever, it is all one, oneness. One. If only we would know this, then we would know that it is all an illusion-- Sitra Achra is 'other' or evil. Evil means something that suggests that it can be other than Hashem (from Sara Idit Sneider's 'Purim Blast'). This is Haman. This is Amalek. This is everything that is evil in this world. But if we would only know for a moment, all of us, on a collective level, that there can be nothing other, than the evil would hang itself in the same way that Haman built the very gallow on which he was hung!!!!
What does it mean to be holy? What is holiness? Holiness means to be whole. It does not mean to be physical, but it does not mean to be spiritual. It means to be both in a balanced way-- individually and collectively. We must strive for wholiness.
So look at this: Esther is the Shechina. She is the divine soul, the Gdly presence as it is in this world, and that part of Hashem that we can connect to because it is the part that resides in our world, and that will finally find a comfortable home in our world in the days of Meshiach, which is so soon. So soon you can feel it. If only we can raise everyone's consciousness: wake up and Shema! The Schechina will no longer be trapped in Ahashverosh's castle. Ester and the Shechina, like the Princess from the song of songs, will be freed. That is Ester.
Mordecai is the righteous tzaddik. Haman is his mirror image, his opposite that is also a part of himself. Haman is Amalek, doubt, Sitra Achra, evil, or 'otherness,' the opposite of Kedusha. Haman is the part of himself that Mordechai must face in order that Ester/ the Shechina can reunite with the King, Ha Melech with a big K. When the magila refers to the KING, we can also read that as talking about God because God is so concealed in our world and in the Purim story that his name is not actually mentioned, not even once.
But what does it means that Haman and the King, basically Hashem and evil, are in this together? Haman told the king to destroy the Jewish people and the king agrees so easily? No, it can't be. So what is going on? The answer is multifaceted, but there are a few things to look at here.
While this played out historically with the real Esther and Mordechai, it could also have just as easily been a drama going on in Mordechai's head/imagination, and therefore it is also repeating in our minds as well. Take a look:
In order for Mordechai to initially face Esther, he must first have experienced this situation with Haman. In the allegory, ir order for the tzaddik to meet the higher levels of his soul or the schechina that dwells within himself, he has to go through many trials in order to reach a state where he can access those parts of himself. The trial is embodied by Haman, but it is essential to realize that, since Hashem is one, and everything is therefore of Hashem, Haman could not even exist without some spark of holiness in him. Therefore, the separation between Mordechai and Haman is only an illusion-- an illusion that has a harsh reality and severe consequences, but an illusion nonetheless. The idea that anything can be purely other than hashem cannot be true, and therefore, the idea that Haman or evil is separate is, at it's core, in our heads. If Mordechai, if you, if I, could truely believe in the pure oneness of Hashem, and if we could understand that not only intllectually, but fully, fully with all our being, than the Haman and all evil would simply melt away and hang itself on the very gallows it built, as happened to Haman. In order for Mordechai to beat Haman, or evil, he must go through Esther. That is to say, he must first connect with the higher parts of his soul. He must then entreat those higher levels of his soul to communicate with Hashem and he must pray to be able to break the illusion and defeat Haman.
So Mordechai is the physical body and tzaddik (righteous person)
Esther is the hidden and higher levels of the soul that can be accessed from this physical plane
And Haman is the yetzer harah/ evil, but really still apart of the oneness.
To reiterate and explain it a little more:
Mordechai is the physical tzaddik or the nefesh. There is evil in the world that he has to overcome (Haman/ Amalek). So, Mordechai must connect with Esther, thehigher levels of his soul or the schechina, and Esther or those higher levels of the soul, must go even higher and plead to God to nullify the evil. By the time Mordechai would have arrived at the state where his soul would be face to face with Hashem, (which corresponds to Esther facing the King and touching the golden scepter), his soul wouldh ave already gone through the process of understanding the true oneness. Before Ester faces the King, she fasts for three days and really prays and prays. Then, before reaching him, she must walk through a long hallway full of statues of the Persian Idols. So, as the Schechina is almost to the king, she must first get by al the idols. The idols represent all the doubt that Esther has. The statues are the evil in the world that say to her, what's the point? You won't save your people. Who do you think you are? You might as well give up! But Esther overcomes these thoughts. So, by he time Mordechai understands all of this in his head, meaning by the time he understands Hashem's true oneness and by the time the higher levels of his soul over come any remaining doubt, evil has ready melted away and hanged itself-- Haman is done for.
Evil exists for many reasons and maybe we cannot understand them, but we can learn from these ideas that one reason evil exists in order for us to pray and ask for it to go away. What is the point of that? We must see how it is necessary that we go through this entire process. For example, if Haman never existed, Mordechai would never have gone through the process of connecting with his higher self (Esther) and with Hashem (The King). When we pray and ask for this elimination of evil, we go through the process of understanding that the things we want to disappear do not hold a true existence of their own anyway. In order to ask God to do away with evil, we must go throw the process of realizing that Hashem is one and those things do not hold any true power or force of their own. Once we understand the true oneness of Hashem, evil will have no power over us any longer.
Happy Purim!!!!!!!!!!!
Shema Yisroel, if only we could really hear, for just a moment, as we did at Sinai, SHEMA please people of the house of Israel, hear it in your heart that Hashem, the everything, the only, the infinite whose presence is concealed in this world, so concealed that often times it is easy to think that he is not real or is not here, our Gd, that was before creation, during, and will be after and forever, it is all one, oneness. One. If only we would know this, then we would know that it is all an illusion-- Sitra Achra is 'other' or evil. Evil means something that suggests that it can be other than Hashem (from Sara Idit Sneider's 'Purim Blast'). This is Haman. This is Amalek. This is everything that is evil in this world. But if we would only know for a moment, all of us, on a collective level, that there can be nothing other, than the evil would hang itself in the same way that Haman built the very gallow on which he was hung!!!!
What does it mean to be holy? What is holiness? Holiness means to be whole. It does not mean to be physical, but it does not mean to be spiritual. It means to be both in a balanced way-- individually and collectively. We must strive for wholiness.
So look at this: Esther is the Shechina. She is the divine soul, the Gdly presence as it is in this world, and that part of Hashem that we can connect to because it is the part that resides in our world, and that will finally find a comfortable home in our world in the days of Meshiach, which is so soon. So soon you can feel it. If only we can raise everyone's consciousness: wake up and Shema! The Schechina will no longer be trapped in Ahashverosh's castle. Ester and the Shechina, like the Princess from the song of songs, will be freed. That is Ester.
Mordecai is the righteous tzaddik. Haman is his mirror image, his opposite that is also a part of himself. Haman is Amalek, doubt, Sitra Achra, evil, or 'otherness,' the opposite of Kedusha. Haman is the part of himself that Mordechai must face in order that Ester/ the Shechina can reunite with the King, Ha Melech with a big K. When the magila refers to the KING, we can also read that as talking about God because God is so concealed in our world and in the Purim story that his name is not actually mentioned, not even once.
But what does it means that Haman and the King, basically Hashem and evil, are in this together? Haman told the king to destroy the Jewish people and the king agrees so easily? No, it can't be. So what is going on? The answer is multifaceted, but there are a few things to look at here.
While this played out historically with the real Esther and Mordechai, it could also have just as easily been a drama going on in Mordechai's head/imagination, and therefore it is also repeating in our minds as well. Take a look:
In order for Mordechai to initially face Esther, he must first have experienced this situation with Haman. In the allegory, ir order for the tzaddik to meet the higher levels of his soul or the schechina that dwells within himself, he has to go through many trials in order to reach a state where he can access those parts of himself. The trial is embodied by Haman, but it is essential to realize that, since Hashem is one, and everything is therefore of Hashem, Haman could not even exist without some spark of holiness in him. Therefore, the separation between Mordechai and Haman is only an illusion-- an illusion that has a harsh reality and severe consequences, but an illusion nonetheless. The idea that anything can be purely other than hashem cannot be true, and therefore, the idea that Haman or evil is separate is, at it's core, in our heads. If Mordechai, if you, if I, could truely believe in the pure oneness of Hashem, and if we could understand that not only intllectually, but fully, fully with all our being, than the Haman and all evil would simply melt away and hang itself on the very gallows it built, as happened to Haman. In order for Mordechai to beat Haman, or evil, he must go through Esther. That is to say, he must first connect with the higher parts of his soul. He must then entreat those higher levels of his soul to communicate with Hashem and he must pray to be able to break the illusion and defeat Haman.
So Mordechai is the physical body and tzaddik (righteous person)
Esther is the hidden and higher levels of the soul that can be accessed from this physical plane
And Haman is the yetzer harah/ evil, but really still apart of the oneness.
To reiterate and explain it a little more:
Mordechai is the physical tzaddik or the nefesh. There is evil in the world that he has to overcome (Haman/ Amalek). So, Mordechai must connect with Esther, thehigher levels of his soul or the schechina, and Esther or those higher levels of the soul, must go even higher and plead to God to nullify the evil. By the time Mordechai would have arrived at the state where his soul would be face to face with Hashem, (which corresponds to Esther facing the King and touching the golden scepter), his soul wouldh ave already gone through the process of understanding the true oneness. Before Ester faces the King, she fasts for three days and really prays and prays. Then, before reaching him, she must walk through a long hallway full of statues of the Persian Idols. So, as the Schechina is almost to the king, she must first get by al the idols. The idols represent all the doubt that Esther has. The statues are the evil in the world that say to her, what's the point? You won't save your people. Who do you think you are? You might as well give up! But Esther overcomes these thoughts. So, by he time Mordechai understands all of this in his head, meaning by the time he understands Hashem's true oneness and by the time the higher levels of his soul over come any remaining doubt, evil has ready melted away and hanged itself-- Haman is done for.
Evil exists for many reasons and maybe we cannot understand them, but we can learn from these ideas that one reason evil exists in order for us to pray and ask for it to go away. What is the point of that? We must see how it is necessary that we go through this entire process. For example, if Haman never existed, Mordechai would never have gone through the process of connecting with his higher self (Esther) and with Hashem (The King). When we pray and ask for this elimination of evil, we go through the process of understanding that the things we want to disappear do not hold a true existence of their own anyway. In order to ask God to do away with evil, we must go throw the process of realizing that Hashem is one and those things do not hold any true power or force of their own. Once we understand the true oneness of Hashem, evil will have no power over us any longer.
Happy Purim!!!!!!!!!!!
Sunday, February 7, 2010
Revealing the Oneness
Parshat Yitro
Briefly, Yitro is Moshe's father in law, Tzipporah's (Moshe's wife) father. He was a Middianite Priest, but when he heard of the wonders that had happened to the Jewish people, he came to join them. Yitro also helped Moshe to organize a judicial system. Also, Yitro is the Parsha in which with receive the torah (10 commandments) at Mt Sinai.
In Parshat Yitro, so much happens! But I want to focus on one lesson that we can learn from this Parsha. I want to look at what we can learn from the parsha about the Shema.
Shema Yisroel, Hashem, Elokeynu, Hashem Echad!
This is the Shema: the first prayer a Jewish child learns to say, and the last thing a Jew says before he dies. But what does it mean?
Hear O Israel, The Lord is our God, the Lord is one?
I mean, I guess. That's what the translation says in my siddur.
But that's not what it really means. That's not the heart and soul of it.
The Shema is very important to us. We say is at least two times a day, although often times more. It is what is written in the mezuzot that we hang on our doorposts, and it is written inside of men's tefillin. I want to explore a little more what the Shema really means. Let's take it word by word.
Also, this torah is my own take on everything I have been learning recently, but especially influenced by Reb. Shlomo Carlebach.
Shema:
Hear. Listen and hear. Hear so well the you see the voices.
What does it mean to really hear someone?
You are talking to you mother, your child, a friend, your spouse... Someone is trying to tell you something that he or she feels is important. You are listening. You hear the words she is saying. But do you really hear her? Do you really hear what she, in the depths of her heart, is trying to relay to you? Even if you are really listening with all your attention, it is almost impossible to really and truly hear what that person wants to say to you. It is even less likely because part of what we mean to say is already lost as soon as we try and put our thoughts and feelings into words. So to really hear something someone else wants to convey from their heart--- that is nearly impossible.
At mount Sinai, we heard so well that we saw the voices. It says, " and all the nation saw the voices."
How is it possible to see voices? When Gd spoke to us at Mt. Sinai, he didn't just speak to us and we heard him as if a big voice came over a loudspeaker. At Mt. Sinai, Gd gave us the torah. What does that mean? What does it mean that he spoke to us and gave us the torah? Gd says to us, "I am the lord your Gd who brought you out of the land of Egypt..." The hebrew word Gd uses for "i" is not the usual word for I, "Ani." Rather, Gd says, "Anochi." We must realize that it is very important to understand not just the english translation of the torah because the hebrew words and letters contain within themselves so much depth and meaning that is lost in translation. What does "Anochi" (I) mean here? One suggestion is the Anochi is actually standing for four aramaic words: Ani (I) Nafshi (my soul) Catavti (I wrote it down) Yehavit (and I hand it over to you). That is what torah is. Torah is the Anochi, the "I", the essence of Hashem. Torah is the soul of Hashem written down. We also learn that Gd spoke the world into being. Therefore, to see the voices was to strip away everything, all the concealment, all the garments, all the obstructions, so that we could literally see the voice of Hashem; Hashem was revealed in such a complete way. In fact, the revelation was so complete that we learn that at Sinai, we stopped having an existence of our own because the revelation was so complete that we saw how everyone was one.... really one, and we were becoming swallowed up in the oneness. Everything is still one now, but at Sinai, it was so clear.
But before moving on, we could also see the voices because everything was so much one that our bodies were also one, and there was no separation between eyes and ears, or between anything for that matter....
Shema! Hear. Hear the oneness.
Shema Yisroel. Hear, Israel! Why Israel? Because it was the Nation of Israel that received the torah, that received this revelation of the oneness of Gd. Mind you, by "oneness of Gd" I don't exactly mean only to say that there is only one Gd. Of course, it is true that there is only one Gd, but that is because there is only Gd because everything in existence is actually apart of the same oneness, which we call Gd, but I will expand more on that shortly. So why Israel? What does it mean for us to have received the torah? What does it mean that Gd calls us his "Special treasure?" What does it mean to be chosen people? Here is what it means: This I learned from Reb Shlomo: We are chosen to tell all of the nations of the world that we are all chosen. That's what it all comes down to. Of course, in the meantime, it is actually much more complicated. We have mitzvot, we have rules and regulations, but the heart and soul of it is that. We are chosen to teach the world that everyone is chosen.
Shema Yisroel, Hear Israel, Hashem:
The word that is spelled Yud and then kay and then vav and then kay. We don't say this word. Instead, we say "hashem," which literally means, "the name." We say "the name" to refer to Gd, because ultimately, how can we know what to call Gd? I personally don't like calling it Gd because I think that word misleads a lot of people. To call it "the name," however, I think is appropriate, because it recognizes that we cannot define Gd, we cannot explain what it is, how is works, how it thinks, or anything. As Elijah says in Petach Eliyahu, "No thought grasps you (Hashem) at all!" So what is the word Yud and kay and vav and kay? It is the name that is the essence of what Gd is, whatever the may be. But also, note that if we did not exist, a name for Gd would not even be necessary, because who needs a name if you are all alone? So the fact that there is a name is already from our perspective and symbolizes some sort of relationship between the infinite and us. And that is what this name of Gd is: it is a connector between the infiniteness of Gd and the finite world. In kabbalistic teachings, (from the little that I know, which is actually a lot less than a little, but it is still fascinating and worth sharing) each letter symbolizes something different.
The Apex of the Yud is significant of the will, when creation was but a desire. It corresponds to the highest level of the soul, the Yechida, which is already swimming with the oneness of hashem that is concealed to us.
The Yud is the mind. It is a small dot-like letter and represents the speck that was the beginning of the begining. Now creation has moved into the 'mind' of Gd. (Please understand that all words used to describe Gd or anything transcendent can only really work as metaphors, so please understand them as such). The Yud also corresponds to the Chaya level of the soul.
The hay is when creation is now an active thought within the mind. The hay is the neshama level of the soul.
The vav is a physically long letter and it represents drawing down these higher levels into the lower worlds. The vav is the ruach level of the soul. It corresponds to speech, as Gd "Spoke" (or rather, speaks) the world(s) into being.
And finally the last hay is the action, the actual creation, the world of action in which we live, and the nefesh. The nefesh is the part of the soul that is actually flowing through our blood. It is the most accessible part of our soul, but it is also easiest for this part of our soul to get confused and to fall in love with our bodies and the physical world. I really wish I could explain this better, but I really can't so I am sorry. I only wanted to show very briefly that there is significance to each letter of hashem's name in how it draws the very high spiritual energy or creative force into our realm of existence.
Here is a chart of some thins that correspond to the letters, but I will not elaborate of them here.
Tetragrammaton World Soul Level Human Manifestation Element
apex of yud Adam Cadamon Yechida Will
Yud Atzilut Chaya Mind Fire
Hay Beriyah Neshama Thought Air
Vav Yetzirah Ruach Speech water
Hay Asiyah Nefesh Action Earth
Shema Yisroel, Hashem... Elokaynu
There is more to "Elokaynu" than I will do it justice, but this word is translated as "our Gd." It is also "judge," but what I especially notice about this word is the "our" part. The "nu." It isn't just "Gd," but rather "Our Gd." This word acknowledges a personal relationship between "Gd", the creator, the infinite, the everything, and us. This word is the romance. It is the love part of the love story.
Shema Yisroel Hashem Elokeynu,...... Hashem Echad!
First hashem is ours, and now hashem is echad, one.
What does it mean that Hashem is one? It means there is only one Gd? Well, I guess so, but that's not really what is means. It means that Hashem is one and that therefore everything is one, because everything is a part of Gd. "Hashem", the yud and kay and vav and kay, the drawing of the infinite to the finite, is all one, every step of the way. If everything is one, than "Gd" is literally everywhere and in everything. If we were able to really see for just an instance, we wouldn't see each others' faces and colors and features and haircuts, and fashion, etc. We would see pure light, pure Gdly light. When Moshe came down from the mountain, his face shone pure light.
So what happened at Sinai? How is it that we could see the voices? Hear with our eyes? Because at Sinai, we received the torah, Gd wrote down his soul and gave it over to us. At Sinai, the oneness of Gd was revealed. Our egos gave away and we knew that we were all connected, we were all created by the same force, and we were all one. Our eyes and our ears knew it, too. Our ears gave up their ego, too. They said, "we are one with the rest of our body, we are one with all of creation, and we don't have to be so selfish so we are the only ones who can hear." So the eyes could hear, too. But it wasn't hearing the way we think of hearing. It was literally a revelation of the fact that everything in this world is really one. It is really just hashem. But in life, Hashem conceals himself from us. At Sinai, however, we knew. It is hard for me to explain because I don't really understand. How can I really understand what it means for everything to really be one, to hear with my eyes? I might think I understand, but I can't hear like that.
So what happened? If we saw it then, we saw the oneness of everything then, then what's the big deal? Why isn't it obvious to us now? Because it was too intense. When Gd spoke to us, when he revealed his oneness, we could not longer have our own existence because it was so apparent that everything was actually Gd and he was actually everywhere, so there was no space for us. We were getting swept away in the oneness, so we said for Gd to be quiet and speak only to Moshe. "They said to Moses, "you speak to us, and we will hear, but let Gd not speak to us lest we die." It was too intense.
But now, now it is our job to notice the holiness everywhere, the Gdliness everywhere, in everything in this world. It is our job to see the Gdliness even where it is not obviously revealed to us. We are working, working, working to arrive at a time when it will be like the receiving of the torah again, except for the whole world, with everyone seeing that it really all is oneness. Then there will be no reason to harm your neighbor, or the animals, or the earth, or yourself, because if you harm one thing, it will be so apparent that it is all one big connected system, and harming one thing harms everything else. Then, we will have peace on earth. This is why Parshat yitro is so important, and why the Shema is, too.
Shema yisroel Hashem Elokaynu, hashem echad.
Hear, Israel! Hear it loud and clear! Hear it so fully that you don't just hear it, but you know it with your entire being! That the source of creation, the infinite creative energy that flows through our world and all the worlds that we cannot see, it is drawing down from the high heights into our realm and sustaining us. It has a name because it made us exist and have a relationship with it. And hear this so well that you know it with your entire being and your entire life and everywhere you look, that "hashem" is one, it's all one, it's all one, it's all one. This is so important to know.
Briefly, Yitro is Moshe's father in law, Tzipporah's (Moshe's wife) father. He was a Middianite Priest, but when he heard of the wonders that had happened to the Jewish people, he came to join them. Yitro also helped Moshe to organize a judicial system. Also, Yitro is the Parsha in which with receive the torah (10 commandments) at Mt Sinai.
In Parshat Yitro, so much happens! But I want to focus on one lesson that we can learn from this Parsha. I want to look at what we can learn from the parsha about the Shema.
Shema Yisroel, Hashem, Elokeynu, Hashem Echad!
This is the Shema: the first prayer a Jewish child learns to say, and the last thing a Jew says before he dies. But what does it mean?
Hear O Israel, The Lord is our God, the Lord is one?
I mean, I guess. That's what the translation says in my siddur.
But that's not what it really means. That's not the heart and soul of it.
The Shema is very important to us. We say is at least two times a day, although often times more. It is what is written in the mezuzot that we hang on our doorposts, and it is written inside of men's tefillin. I want to explore a little more what the Shema really means. Let's take it word by word.
Also, this torah is my own take on everything I have been learning recently, but especially influenced by Reb. Shlomo Carlebach.
Shema:
Hear. Listen and hear. Hear so well the you see the voices.
What does it mean to really hear someone?
You are talking to you mother, your child, a friend, your spouse... Someone is trying to tell you something that he or she feels is important. You are listening. You hear the words she is saying. But do you really hear her? Do you really hear what she, in the depths of her heart, is trying to relay to you? Even if you are really listening with all your attention, it is almost impossible to really and truly hear what that person wants to say to you. It is even less likely because part of what we mean to say is already lost as soon as we try and put our thoughts and feelings into words. So to really hear something someone else wants to convey from their heart--- that is nearly impossible.
At mount Sinai, we heard so well that we saw the voices. It says, " and all the nation saw the voices."
How is it possible to see voices? When Gd spoke to us at Mt. Sinai, he didn't just speak to us and we heard him as if a big voice came over a loudspeaker. At Mt. Sinai, Gd gave us the torah. What does that mean? What does it mean that he spoke to us and gave us the torah? Gd says to us, "I am the lord your Gd who brought you out of the land of Egypt..." The hebrew word Gd uses for "i" is not the usual word for I, "Ani." Rather, Gd says, "Anochi." We must realize that it is very important to understand not just the english translation of the torah because the hebrew words and letters contain within themselves so much depth and meaning that is lost in translation. What does "Anochi" (I) mean here? One suggestion is the Anochi is actually standing for four aramaic words: Ani (I) Nafshi (my soul) Catavti (I wrote it down) Yehavit (and I hand it over to you). That is what torah is. Torah is the Anochi, the "I", the essence of Hashem. Torah is the soul of Hashem written down. We also learn that Gd spoke the world into being. Therefore, to see the voices was to strip away everything, all the concealment, all the garments, all the obstructions, so that we could literally see the voice of Hashem; Hashem was revealed in such a complete way. In fact, the revelation was so complete that we learn that at Sinai, we stopped having an existence of our own because the revelation was so complete that we saw how everyone was one.... really one, and we were becoming swallowed up in the oneness. Everything is still one now, but at Sinai, it was so clear.
But before moving on, we could also see the voices because everything was so much one that our bodies were also one, and there was no separation between eyes and ears, or between anything for that matter....
Shema! Hear. Hear the oneness.
Shema Yisroel. Hear, Israel! Why Israel? Because it was the Nation of Israel that received the torah, that received this revelation of the oneness of Gd. Mind you, by "oneness of Gd" I don't exactly mean only to say that there is only one Gd. Of course, it is true that there is only one Gd, but that is because there is only Gd because everything in existence is actually apart of the same oneness, which we call Gd, but I will expand more on that shortly. So why Israel? What does it mean for us to have received the torah? What does it mean that Gd calls us his "Special treasure?" What does it mean to be chosen people? Here is what it means: This I learned from Reb Shlomo: We are chosen to tell all of the nations of the world that we are all chosen. That's what it all comes down to. Of course, in the meantime, it is actually much more complicated. We have mitzvot, we have rules and regulations, but the heart and soul of it is that. We are chosen to teach the world that everyone is chosen.
Shema Yisroel, Hear Israel, Hashem:
The word that is spelled Yud and then kay and then vav and then kay. We don't say this word. Instead, we say "hashem," which literally means, "the name." We say "the name" to refer to Gd, because ultimately, how can we know what to call Gd? I personally don't like calling it Gd because I think that word misleads a lot of people. To call it "the name," however, I think is appropriate, because it recognizes that we cannot define Gd, we cannot explain what it is, how is works, how it thinks, or anything. As Elijah says in Petach Eliyahu, "No thought grasps you (Hashem) at all!" So what is the word Yud and kay and vav and kay? It is the name that is the essence of what Gd is, whatever the may be. But also, note that if we did not exist, a name for Gd would not even be necessary, because who needs a name if you are all alone? So the fact that there is a name is already from our perspective and symbolizes some sort of relationship between the infinite and us. And that is what this name of Gd is: it is a connector between the infiniteness of Gd and the finite world. In kabbalistic teachings, (from the little that I know, which is actually a lot less than a little, but it is still fascinating and worth sharing) each letter symbolizes something different.
The Apex of the Yud is significant of the will, when creation was but a desire. It corresponds to the highest level of the soul, the Yechida, which is already swimming with the oneness of hashem that is concealed to us.
The Yud is the mind. It is a small dot-like letter and represents the speck that was the beginning of the begining. Now creation has moved into the 'mind' of Gd. (Please understand that all words used to describe Gd or anything transcendent can only really work as metaphors, so please understand them as such). The Yud also corresponds to the Chaya level of the soul.
The hay is when creation is now an active thought within the mind. The hay is the neshama level of the soul.
The vav is a physically long letter and it represents drawing down these higher levels into the lower worlds. The vav is the ruach level of the soul. It corresponds to speech, as Gd "Spoke" (or rather, speaks) the world(s) into being.
And finally the last hay is the action, the actual creation, the world of action in which we live, and the nefesh. The nefesh is the part of the soul that is actually flowing through our blood. It is the most accessible part of our soul, but it is also easiest for this part of our soul to get confused and to fall in love with our bodies and the physical world. I really wish I could explain this better, but I really can't so I am sorry. I only wanted to show very briefly that there is significance to each letter of hashem's name in how it draws the very high spiritual energy or creative force into our realm of existence.
Here is a chart of some thins that correspond to the letters, but I will not elaborate of them here.
Tetragrammaton World Soul Level Human Manifestation Element
apex of yud Adam Cadamon Yechida Will
Yud Atzilut Chaya Mind Fire
Hay Beriyah Neshama Thought Air
Vav Yetzirah Ruach Speech water
Hay Asiyah Nefesh Action Earth
Shema Yisroel, Hashem... Elokaynu
There is more to "Elokaynu" than I will do it justice, but this word is translated as "our Gd." It is also "judge," but what I especially notice about this word is the "our" part. The "nu." It isn't just "Gd," but rather "Our Gd." This word acknowledges a personal relationship between "Gd", the creator, the infinite, the everything, and us. This word is the romance. It is the love part of the love story.
Shema Yisroel Hashem Elokeynu,...... Hashem Echad!
First hashem is ours, and now hashem is echad, one.
What does it mean that Hashem is one? It means there is only one Gd? Well, I guess so, but that's not really what is means. It means that Hashem is one and that therefore everything is one, because everything is a part of Gd. "Hashem", the yud and kay and vav and kay, the drawing of the infinite to the finite, is all one, every step of the way. If everything is one, than "Gd" is literally everywhere and in everything. If we were able to really see for just an instance, we wouldn't see each others' faces and colors and features and haircuts, and fashion, etc. We would see pure light, pure Gdly light. When Moshe came down from the mountain, his face shone pure light.
So what happened at Sinai? How is it that we could see the voices? Hear with our eyes? Because at Sinai, we received the torah, Gd wrote down his soul and gave it over to us. At Sinai, the oneness of Gd was revealed. Our egos gave away and we knew that we were all connected, we were all created by the same force, and we were all one. Our eyes and our ears knew it, too. Our ears gave up their ego, too. They said, "we are one with the rest of our body, we are one with all of creation, and we don't have to be so selfish so we are the only ones who can hear." So the eyes could hear, too. But it wasn't hearing the way we think of hearing. It was literally a revelation of the fact that everything in this world is really one. It is really just hashem. But in life, Hashem conceals himself from us. At Sinai, however, we knew. It is hard for me to explain because I don't really understand. How can I really understand what it means for everything to really be one, to hear with my eyes? I might think I understand, but I can't hear like that.
So what happened? If we saw it then, we saw the oneness of everything then, then what's the big deal? Why isn't it obvious to us now? Because it was too intense. When Gd spoke to us, when he revealed his oneness, we could not longer have our own existence because it was so apparent that everything was actually Gd and he was actually everywhere, so there was no space for us. We were getting swept away in the oneness, so we said for Gd to be quiet and speak only to Moshe. "They said to Moses, "you speak to us, and we will hear, but let Gd not speak to us lest we die." It was too intense.
But now, now it is our job to notice the holiness everywhere, the Gdliness everywhere, in everything in this world. It is our job to see the Gdliness even where it is not obviously revealed to us. We are working, working, working to arrive at a time when it will be like the receiving of the torah again, except for the whole world, with everyone seeing that it really all is oneness. Then there will be no reason to harm your neighbor, or the animals, or the earth, or yourself, because if you harm one thing, it will be so apparent that it is all one big connected system, and harming one thing harms everything else. Then, we will have peace on earth. This is why Parshat yitro is so important, and why the Shema is, too.
Shema yisroel Hashem Elokaynu, hashem echad.
Hear, Israel! Hear it loud and clear! Hear it so fully that you don't just hear it, but you know it with your entire being! That the source of creation, the infinite creative energy that flows through our world and all the worlds that we cannot see, it is drawing down from the high heights into our realm and sustaining us. It has a name because it made us exist and have a relationship with it. And hear this so well that you know it with your entire being and your entire life and everywhere you look, that "hashem" is one, it's all one, it's all one, it's all one. This is so important to know.
Lost in the desert
Beshalach
I didn't really write anything for Beshalach. It was also tu Bishvat, the new year of the trees. That week it was a little bit like I myself was wandering through the desert. I was not grounded. I moved from staying at the dorms in one seminary to a hostel in the old city. For shabbas I went to Tzvat and an hour before shabbas my accommodations fell through and I had to find a new place to sleep. There are some really amazing people that I should thank because they treated me like family and didn't even know me. So, it all worked out, and in two days I am moving into an apartment with a few girls in a great location. Very excited. I feel like a lot happened in my life during Parshat Beshalach, and also so much happened in that Parsha: The splitting of the red sea, the celebration of Miriam and all the women with tambourines and singing, entering into the desert, the war with Amalek, etc. At one point, Israel begins traveling in the desert, and as they begin to complain, Gd tells the people to turn around and head back towards Egypt. They do turn around, but they do not go all the way back. They end up turning back around yet again, but nevertheless they had to go backwards a little bit before going forwards. It had to appear to the Egyptians as if they were lost, and maybe it even felt to the Hebrews like they were really lost, but ultimately they continued forward on their correct path. This was a good lesson for me to keep in mind as I was moving from place to place, feeling a little lost, living out of my sleeping bad and off of a diet of nuts and dried fruit. I kept in mind that Israel had to wander around "lost" (but not truly lost) in the desrt before moving forward on their path. So thankfully I am getting to a place where I am becoming a little more settled here. I am very happy, learning a lot, meeting new, amazing people.
I didn't really write anything for Beshalach. It was also tu Bishvat, the new year of the trees. That week it was a little bit like I myself was wandering through the desert. I was not grounded. I moved from staying at the dorms in one seminary to a hostel in the old city. For shabbas I went to Tzvat and an hour before shabbas my accommodations fell through and I had to find a new place to sleep. There are some really amazing people that I should thank because they treated me like family and didn't even know me. So, it all worked out, and in two days I am moving into an apartment with a few girls in a great location. Very excited. I feel like a lot happened in my life during Parshat Beshalach, and also so much happened in that Parsha: The splitting of the red sea, the celebration of Miriam and all the women with tambourines and singing, entering into the desert, the war with Amalek, etc. At one point, Israel begins traveling in the desert, and as they begin to complain, Gd tells the people to turn around and head back towards Egypt. They do turn around, but they do not go all the way back. They end up turning back around yet again, but nevertheless they had to go backwards a little bit before going forwards. It had to appear to the Egyptians as if they were lost, and maybe it even felt to the Hebrews like they were really lost, but ultimately they continued forward on their correct path. This was a good lesson for me to keep in mind as I was moving from place to place, feeling a little lost, living out of my sleeping bad and off of a diet of nuts and dried fruit. I kept in mind that Israel had to wander around "lost" (but not truly lost) in the desrt before moving forward on their path. So thankfully I am getting to a place where I am becoming a little more settled here. I am very happy, learning a lot, meeting new, amazing people.
Saturday, January 23, 2010
Kidneys and Teshuva, and the Power to Control Time.
Kidneys and Teshuva, and the power to control time.
Parshat Bo. (Bo= "Come")
Kidneys and Teshuva
What are kidneys? Kidneys filter out the bad from your blood, and leave the good.
I am on my journey of doing teshuva, and for several months right as I was really moving forward in this process, my back was hurting me so badly right in the spot of my right kidney. I think about how my kidney was making itself known to me just as I was at a pinnacle moment of filtering out the bad from the good in my spiritual life. Parshat Bo has a message for me as to how I can continue on this path of cleansing and filtering. In Bo, Hashem tells Moshe to "Come to Paroh." Just as Moshe had to face Paroh straight on, I too have to face straight on the things I want to filter out spiritually. But hashem does not tell Moshe to "go" to Paroh, but rather to "come." From this, I learn that not only do I have to face my challenges, but I have to know that I am not going alone. Rather, I am "coming" with hashem, who is with me all the while, just as he was with Moshe when Moshe had to face Paroh.
We have the power to control time
In Parshat Bo, we also learn about Rosh Chodesh. We are told that in this parsha, we shall consider it the first month, because it is the month we were taken out of Egypt. The Jewish monthly calendar is based on the lunar cycle. Just as the moon has no light of it's own, but is actually just a reflection of the sun's light, so too are we a reflection of Hashem's light in the world. Now-a-days, we have a set calendar telling us when the new months begin. Before, however, the new month had to be declared by witnesses who could see the sky and see that it was, indeed, a new moon. If the sky was cloudy on the day that should have been rosh chodesh, then the witnesses could not declare it rosh chodesh. In that case, they would wait until the next day when they could see the moon. Only then would they declare the new month. Then, the new month would begin a day later, but nevertheless, the day they declared it would actually be the first day of the new month. The entire calendar will follow accordingly. In this way, we see how our actions were really capable of declaring and controlling time.
We have the power to change the stars
In Parshat Bo, there is a point where Paroh says to Moshe, "fine, take your people out of Egypt, but know that evil will befall you in the desert." What does Paroh mean by "Evil will befall you in the desert?" One commentary says that Paroh's astrologers looked into the stars and saw that there was an evil omen upon the Hebrews, and that there would be bloodshed if they were to leave. Of course, we know that the Hebrews did not experience bloodshed when they went to the desert, and yet Paroh's star gazers were not wrong. Indeed, the stars did predict evil and blood, but when Hashem felt angry with us, he remembered that we trusted him, he remembered our actions, and he took the blood of circumcision to appease his anger. The bad omen was still there, but by our actions, we were actually able to change the way the omen was played out. We learn from this that we actually have the power, through our actions, to change the future, to really re-align the stars! This is one reason why we know we are not supposed to get our future told: because we have the ability to change a decree based on our actions.
We also know that Hasem promised that the Hebrews would only have to be in Egypt for 200 years, but we know that he wanted certain things from us before we would merit leaving. Of course, whether we deserved it or not, he would have to let us leave by 200 years. Now, we are hoping for the time of moshiach when there will be peace on this earth. We know that it has been promised that this time should come by the year 7,000 at the latest, but we also know that we have the power to change the stars, to change our decrees, based on our actions. Therefore, if our actions merit it, we can bring in moshiach sooner. We know that we have the power to control time, to realign the stars, to change our mazel. We see it happening in parshat Bo, and now, if only we can be like the moon and reflect Hashem's light in this world, we can change our mazel again and make peace on this earth, now!
Parshat Bo. (Bo= "Come")
Kidneys and Teshuva
What are kidneys? Kidneys filter out the bad from your blood, and leave the good.
I am on my journey of doing teshuva, and for several months right as I was really moving forward in this process, my back was hurting me so badly right in the spot of my right kidney. I think about how my kidney was making itself known to me just as I was at a pinnacle moment of filtering out the bad from the good in my spiritual life. Parshat Bo has a message for me as to how I can continue on this path of cleansing and filtering. In Bo, Hashem tells Moshe to "Come to Paroh." Just as Moshe had to face Paroh straight on, I too have to face straight on the things I want to filter out spiritually. But hashem does not tell Moshe to "go" to Paroh, but rather to "come." From this, I learn that not only do I have to face my challenges, but I have to know that I am not going alone. Rather, I am "coming" with hashem, who is with me all the while, just as he was with Moshe when Moshe had to face Paroh.
We have the power to control time
In Parshat Bo, we also learn about Rosh Chodesh. We are told that in this parsha, we shall consider it the first month, because it is the month we were taken out of Egypt. The Jewish monthly calendar is based on the lunar cycle. Just as the moon has no light of it's own, but is actually just a reflection of the sun's light, so too are we a reflection of Hashem's light in the world. Now-a-days, we have a set calendar telling us when the new months begin. Before, however, the new month had to be declared by witnesses who could see the sky and see that it was, indeed, a new moon. If the sky was cloudy on the day that should have been rosh chodesh, then the witnesses could not declare it rosh chodesh. In that case, they would wait until the next day when they could see the moon. Only then would they declare the new month. Then, the new month would begin a day later, but nevertheless, the day they declared it would actually be the first day of the new month. The entire calendar will follow accordingly. In this way, we see how our actions were really capable of declaring and controlling time.
We have the power to change the stars
In Parshat Bo, there is a point where Paroh says to Moshe, "fine, take your people out of Egypt, but know that evil will befall you in the desert." What does Paroh mean by "Evil will befall you in the desert?" One commentary says that Paroh's astrologers looked into the stars and saw that there was an evil omen upon the Hebrews, and that there would be bloodshed if they were to leave. Of course, we know that the Hebrews did not experience bloodshed when they went to the desert, and yet Paroh's star gazers were not wrong. Indeed, the stars did predict evil and blood, but when Hashem felt angry with us, he remembered that we trusted him, he remembered our actions, and he took the blood of circumcision to appease his anger. The bad omen was still there, but by our actions, we were actually able to change the way the omen was played out. We learn from this that we actually have the power, through our actions, to change the future, to really re-align the stars! This is one reason why we know we are not supposed to get our future told: because we have the ability to change a decree based on our actions.
We also know that Hasem promised that the Hebrews would only have to be in Egypt for 200 years, but we know that he wanted certain things from us before we would merit leaving. Of course, whether we deserved it or not, he would have to let us leave by 200 years. Now, we are hoping for the time of moshiach when there will be peace on this earth. We know that it has been promised that this time should come by the year 7,000 at the latest, but we also know that we have the power to change the stars, to change our decrees, based on our actions. Therefore, if our actions merit it, we can bring in moshiach sooner. We know that we have the power to control time, to realign the stars, to change our mazel. We see it happening in parshat Bo, and now, if only we can be like the moon and reflect Hashem's light in this world, we can change our mazel again and make peace on this earth, now!
Sunday, January 17, 2010
Shvat: Fixing Eating
Shavua Tov v' Chodesh Tov!
Today is 2 Shvat. Today we did a wonderful class at Simchat Shlomo about the teachings of Rev Carlebach about the month of Shvat. I am copying it down to share:
Shvat is the month to fix: eating
tribe of: Asher
letter: tzaddik
Shvat:
Every month you have to fix a certain emotion, a certain something in your soul. Everybody knows that in Kislev you have to fix sleeping. Last month, Teves, the fixing was anger, and this month the fixing is Le'ita, stuffing yourself.
Now open your hearts in the deepest way.
This is a Torah from the Holy Ishbitser, open your hearts please.
You know friends, animals don't stuff themselves, they eat exactly as much as the need. Why is it that we human beings have such infinite hunger? Now listen to me friends, you see what it is? The truth is that we are the only creatures in the world that can reach beyond ourselves. The lowest person can become the highest. At the lowest moment in my life, I can reach out and become the highest. We have something; we are infinite. The question is only what are we doing with that hunger? If you don't know what to do with it, you stuff yourself with money, pleasure, with food... anything. But the truth is that G-d gave you this feeling for something unbelievable.
Now listen to this sweetest friends, every month also has one letter.
THe letter of this month is tzadik, tzadik means a holy man. What's a holy man? what's a holy woman? what's holy? Holy is if I lived with that hunger with stuffing myself to the deepest, highest, holiest. Some people stuff themselves with pleasure, some people stuff themselves with good deeds. Some people cannot stop looking for another Chinese restaurant, and some people can't stop looking for a poor man, to bring joy to another human being, very special life.
I want to bless you and me, we should meet the right people, holy people to teach us how to lift oneself up.
One more very beautiful thing. The Ishbitser says that Le'ita means that I am stuffing myself so much that I don't even bother chewing it.
I just throw it into my mouth and swallow it. You know what that means on a spiritual level? To chew something means that I am cutting it down to my level. If I don't chew it that means that I want it the way it is.
What's bugging you and me? You buy a book on theology, it has nothing to do with G!d, you know why? It's chewed over food, chewing G-d to my level. What is theology? Chewing everything to me level, but who wants that?
Why is it that sometimes you go to a synagogue, and the rabbi gave a speech but gevalt, he has two million teeth the way he chewed the portion of the week. It's so low; I don't want that. I want something so holy. I didn't come to synagogue to chew. I come to synagogue to be stuffed with something exalted, unchewed...unchewed.
But again... it's up to us. I could stuff myself with something stupid, or I could stuff myself with something holy.
Now open your hearts for one more minute. Everybody knows that the twelve months are divided by the twelve holy trices. This month is the month of Asher. What is the specialty of Asher? it says, "Barush Mibanim ASher," Asher has the most beautiful children. And it says that all the kings of Israel wanted their daughters to marry from the tribe of Asher because they were so beautiful. Obviously not only physically, but on the highest level. You know friends, a lot of people, when they talk to their children they chew it so low, like it's cute, but there is no G!d in it anymore, nothing left. Then the children grow up and they think G!d is a joke. They think other people are a joke. What did you tell them about life? You know what you have to do with children? Stuff them with unchewed food. Give it to them. It's so holy. Don't touch it. Just give it to them the way it is. Take a fire from heaven and just put it in their hearts. DOn't tell them that Shabbos is cute and fun.
At one time I was somewhere in the city, thank G!d I was there because there was the biggest desecration before our non-Jewish brothers and sisters. It was Channukah and two people were on the program, humble me and the president of the community. It was a big city. They interviewed him first. They asked him, "what is Channukah?" He had this really chewed food expression on his face. He says, "Channukah, lots of fun. Lot's of parties, latkes, and a lot of fun."
If I wasn't Jewish then it's clear to me that these Jews are crazy.
That's all you have to say about Channukah? When we kindle the lights by the door and we want to turn the whole world to G!d, that's all you have to say, latkes and fun? Who was his rabbi? My children were three years old and they knew more about Channukah than most probably he and his rabbi, and how much his rabbi will know when he will be 150.
You see what it is, do you know what the worls is looking for? RIght now the nights are very long, lots of darkness in the world. You know what the world wants when it's very dark? Don't give me something to chew on. Stuff me with something exalted, something holy. Give it to me the way it is.
Baruch Mibnem Asher. ASher knew the secrets how to give over G!d to his children. Don't make it childish. Give it over to them on the highest, deepest level, and then your children are so beautiful that all the kings of the world want to be part of your family.
Today is 2 Shvat. Today we did a wonderful class at Simchat Shlomo about the teachings of Rev Carlebach about the month of Shvat. I am copying it down to share:
Shvat is the month to fix: eating
tribe of: Asher
letter: tzaddik
Shvat:
Every month you have to fix a certain emotion, a certain something in your soul. Everybody knows that in Kislev you have to fix sleeping. Last month, Teves, the fixing was anger, and this month the fixing is Le'ita, stuffing yourself.
Now open your hearts in the deepest way.
This is a Torah from the Holy Ishbitser, open your hearts please.
You know friends, animals don't stuff themselves, they eat exactly as much as the need. Why is it that we human beings have such infinite hunger? Now listen to me friends, you see what it is? The truth is that we are the only creatures in the world that can reach beyond ourselves. The lowest person can become the highest. At the lowest moment in my life, I can reach out and become the highest. We have something; we are infinite. The question is only what are we doing with that hunger? If you don't know what to do with it, you stuff yourself with money, pleasure, with food... anything. But the truth is that G-d gave you this feeling for something unbelievable.
Now listen to this sweetest friends, every month also has one letter.
THe letter of this month is tzadik, tzadik means a holy man. What's a holy man? what's a holy woman? what's holy? Holy is if I lived with that hunger with stuffing myself to the deepest, highest, holiest. Some people stuff themselves with pleasure, some people stuff themselves with good deeds. Some people cannot stop looking for another Chinese restaurant, and some people can't stop looking for a poor man, to bring joy to another human being, very special life.
I want to bless you and me, we should meet the right people, holy people to teach us how to lift oneself up.
One more very beautiful thing. The Ishbitser says that Le'ita means that I am stuffing myself so much that I don't even bother chewing it.
I just throw it into my mouth and swallow it. You know what that means on a spiritual level? To chew something means that I am cutting it down to my level. If I don't chew it that means that I want it the way it is.
What's bugging you and me? You buy a book on theology, it has nothing to do with G!d, you know why? It's chewed over food, chewing G-d to my level. What is theology? Chewing everything to me level, but who wants that?
Why is it that sometimes you go to a synagogue, and the rabbi gave a speech but gevalt, he has two million teeth the way he chewed the portion of the week. It's so low; I don't want that. I want something so holy. I didn't come to synagogue to chew. I come to synagogue to be stuffed with something exalted, unchewed...unchewed.
But again... it's up to us. I could stuff myself with something stupid, or I could stuff myself with something holy.
Now open your hearts for one more minute. Everybody knows that the twelve months are divided by the twelve holy trices. This month is the month of Asher. What is the specialty of Asher? it says, "Barush Mibanim ASher," Asher has the most beautiful children. And it says that all the kings of Israel wanted their daughters to marry from the tribe of Asher because they were so beautiful. Obviously not only physically, but on the highest level. You know friends, a lot of people, when they talk to their children they chew it so low, like it's cute, but there is no G!d in it anymore, nothing left. Then the children grow up and they think G!d is a joke. They think other people are a joke. What did you tell them about life? You know what you have to do with children? Stuff them with unchewed food. Give it to them. It's so holy. Don't touch it. Just give it to them the way it is. Take a fire from heaven and just put it in their hearts. DOn't tell them that Shabbos is cute and fun.
At one time I was somewhere in the city, thank G!d I was there because there was the biggest desecration before our non-Jewish brothers and sisters. It was Channukah and two people were on the program, humble me and the president of the community. It was a big city. They interviewed him first. They asked him, "what is Channukah?" He had this really chewed food expression on his face. He says, "Channukah, lots of fun. Lot's of parties, latkes, and a lot of fun."
If I wasn't Jewish then it's clear to me that these Jews are crazy.
That's all you have to say about Channukah? When we kindle the lights by the door and we want to turn the whole world to G!d, that's all you have to say, latkes and fun? Who was his rabbi? My children were three years old and they knew more about Channukah than most probably he and his rabbi, and how much his rabbi will know when he will be 150.
You see what it is, do you know what the worls is looking for? RIght now the nights are very long, lots of darkness in the world. You know what the world wants when it's very dark? Don't give me something to chew on. Stuff me with something exalted, something holy. Give it to me the way it is.
Baruch Mibnem Asher. ASher knew the secrets how to give over G!d to his children. Don't make it childish. Give it over to them on the highest, deepest level, and then your children are so beautiful that all the kings of the world want to be part of your family.
Va' eira
V' eira
If G!d wants the hebrews to be free from Mitzrayim, then why bother going through the motions of having Moshe ask Paroh? There are many answers, but one thing that we can take away from this is that G!d does not want to just automatically give us everything that we need. Rather, he wants us to be able to know what it is that we need, lack, or long for, and to ask for it. (This is one reason for prayer)
The Hebrews are ultimately freed from Mitzrayim (Egypt, but also enslavement or exile) not only so they can no longer be slaves, but so that they can go to Sinai to receive the torah, and therefore be able to serve G!d. In this case then, what is lacked is the ability to fully serve G!d. So Moshe must ask to be freed from Mitzrayim, but he must first know what he lacks. So not only does he have to ask, but he (and the Hebrews) have to be shown the true power of G!d in order to not just know what they lack, but to long for it, so that they will ask for it and be able to receive it. Because G!d does give us free choice, we must ask for what we need in order that he should grant it to us.
Hashem wanted us to be free all along. He wants us to live by his torah, but we are free beings. We have the freedom of choice. Although he is always giving us clues and hints about the direction we should take, it is up to us to connect enough with our true selves and with G!d in order to be sensitive enough to hear G!d's perceive these hints, to know what we lack, and to know what we truly long for.
It is up to us to do tikkun (to improve the worlds and bring goodness into the world), to elevate this world. Therefore, we use our G!dly soul in harmony with our earthly bodies and physical selves to be able to hear the needs of our soul. Only then will we be able to know what to ask for, and only then will we be able to free ourselves from our own personal Mitzrayim (enslavements or exiles, whatever they may be for you personally).
In order to do tikkun in the world and create peace on this earth, we must start with knowing what we truly long for in our souls, and we may start by asking for that. That is the beginning to how we will ultimately do tikkun olam and heal the world.
If G!d wants the hebrews to be free from Mitzrayim, then why bother going through the motions of having Moshe ask Paroh? There are many answers, but one thing that we can take away from this is that G!d does not want to just automatically give us everything that we need. Rather, he wants us to be able to know what it is that we need, lack, or long for, and to ask for it. (This is one reason for prayer)
The Hebrews are ultimately freed from Mitzrayim (Egypt, but also enslavement or exile) not only so they can no longer be slaves, but so that they can go to Sinai to receive the torah, and therefore be able to serve G!d. In this case then, what is lacked is the ability to fully serve G!d. So Moshe must ask to be freed from Mitzrayim, but he must first know what he lacks. So not only does he have to ask, but he (and the Hebrews) have to be shown the true power of G!d in order to not just know what they lack, but to long for it, so that they will ask for it and be able to receive it. Because G!d does give us free choice, we must ask for what we need in order that he should grant it to us.
Hashem wanted us to be free all along. He wants us to live by his torah, but we are free beings. We have the freedom of choice. Although he is always giving us clues and hints about the direction we should take, it is up to us to connect enough with our true selves and with G!d in order to be sensitive enough to hear G!d's perceive these hints, to know what we lack, and to know what we truly long for.
It is up to us to do tikkun (to improve the worlds and bring goodness into the world), to elevate this world. Therefore, we use our G!dly soul in harmony with our earthly bodies and physical selves to be able to hear the needs of our soul. Only then will we be able to know what to ask for, and only then will we be able to free ourselves from our own personal Mitzrayim (enslavements or exiles, whatever they may be for you personally).
In order to do tikkun in the world and create peace on this earth, we must start with knowing what we truly long for in our souls, and we may start by asking for that. That is the beginning to how we will ultimately do tikkun olam and heal the world.
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